第5期下：魔性中专师傅他又来了！丨《脱口秀和Ta的朋友们 第二季》 STAND-UP COMEDY2
Come on, applause, welcome Xiaoqi. Hello everyone, I’m Xiaoqi. I ‘m from Northeast China. I’m from Fuxin, Liaoning. Have you heard of this city? (No) Well , then I haven’t heard of Shanghai either . I don’t like Fuxin very much because there are no young people and no entertainment. I don’t know if the only bar in Fuxin is serious or not because it sells spicy hot pot. There is no werewolf shop. They only kill werewolves in their lives. Aging is very serious. There are a lot of old men and women in the square chatting every day about who died last night. The housing prices are also very magical . The house I bought in my hometown now is worth 30,000. I bought it for 100,000. It’s amazing. It’s not very cheap, but it falls very quickly. I comfort myself by saying that there is one advantage of a 100,000 house, that is, the maximum compensation is 100,000. Who would have thought that this house is leaking and the downstairs wants 8,600 from me. I said I’ll give you the house and I’ll flood you twice. It’s hard to find a house in a big city. I complained to my friends, do you understand? I was in Shanghai and said my house was too cheap, 30,000 for 60 square meters. He said the total price was 1.8 million. I said the total price was 30,000 , so cheap. My toilet was only 32,000. What did I mean by that? My whole family, my mom and dad , don’t live in a more expensive place than your dad . They didn’t understand. I bought that house for 30,000 in my hometown. One year I was short of money and wanted to sell it , but I couldn’t. They probably didn’t understand why someone would be short of 30,000. It’s not like winning 30,000 by playing mahjong. Some people are so smart that they think they know finance and give me that kind of crooked trick. You mortgage your house and don’t pay back the money. Once the bank takes the house away, it’s equivalent to selling it. I said, how can I I paid 7,800 RMB for a house worth 30,000 RMB , and the bank said I could pay 360 RMB a month. I said I didn’t pay it back, and six months later I became a deadbeat with 2,100 RMB in arrears. I don’t like taking the high-speed rail , and there are no jobs for young people in Fuxin. As a result, my father thinks that there is only one kind of job in the world , which is to get into the system. Do you know what it means to get into the system in Northeast China? It feels like I have instantly changed from a person from Fuxin, Liaoning to a Beijing kid. I really don’t understand. My father tried to spend 150,000 RMB to get me a job at a highway toll station when I just graduated. I paid 1,800 RMB a month. I asked him why he paid 150,000 RMB for 5 houses and earned 1,800 RMB. My father said it was a stable iron rice bowl. I thought 5,800 RMB is an iron rice bowl. 1,800 RMB That’s called an ear pick . They do it because it’s iron. I think they do it for face, do you understand? Because I want a stable job that pays 1,800 yuan instead of 150,000 yuan. I can find a job that pays 3,000 yuan. I told my boss that I only want 1,800 yuan and we can be stable. Even if the boss’s business goes bankrupt , he has to take me with him because it’s hard to find such a fool. In order to convince me, he drove me to the highway toll station to see and said, “Look, this job is easy and simple. I’m not going to hide it from you, friends. Have you seen some highway toll collectors? The camera is on and every action is strictly required. The smile is very weird, right? A car drove over and he said, ” Have a safe journey ?” I was shocked at the time and said, “What is he laughing at? What does it mean?” He wanted to tell me , “Look, I have 150,000 yuan and I can’t spend it. Do you think I’m stupid?” But even though I cursed like that , you can tell from that imitation that I did do that job , but I didn’t spend that money. The swindler who asked for 150,000 was arrested, but after I went there, I found that I was not suitable for this job at all because it had very strict management and I have ADHD. I’m sure you have noticed that I can’t even talk without shaking my head. The next day I started working, I was reprimanded for picking my hand. My friends couldn’t believe it and asked, “You were picking your boss’s hand . It’s there when you shake hands. ” And I was particularly afraid of being a substitute . I worked for 18 hours straight. How did your friends feel? There were a lot of cars that day. I felt that my apple muscles were strained from laughing, and I immediately grew eight apple muscles. Later, they began to tremble because they were exhausted. The driver was scared when he looked at me because I smiled at him like that. Is anti -fatigue driving so strict? I thought, if I’m like this and I still spend 150,000 to get a regular job, I might as well steal 150,000 and go to jail. Friends, I calculated that the second one is more cost-effective. I stole 150,000 and was sentenced to at most 6 years in prison. It took 7 years to get my money back. In prison, I can still make money by operating a sewing machine. Although I’m not on the payroll, I have a number. If my dad dares to ask I asked why I was in jail. I said it was stable and I could watch celebrities. I thought stability was the only benefit of this job. In the second year I worked there , I was replaced by ETC (electronic toll collection). They asked me to call and sell ETC (electronic toll collection) every day. I felt humiliated because I was not replaced by artificial intelligence, so ETC (electronic toll collection) is not smart. This thing has been around since the early 2000s . I felt that the wheel of the times had driven 5 kilometers and then turned around and ran over me. There are still young people in Fuxin who can kill you. So when did I decide to quit this job and do talk shows ? I went to visit my grandfather’s grave and found that life is unstable and full of surprises. According to local customs, I put on a speaker that plays 24 hours a day. Then I went again the next day and it ran out of power. It changed from the Namo Amitabha to noisy. I said it was too scary, but I suddenly realized that if I stayed in Fuxin, I would be the battery in the speaker. I would run out of power in one position. So I don’t want to be a battery, I want to be a firework. I think when I die, my ashes should be made into fireworks and set off for me. I guess my children will still be talking about my dad doing talk shows all his life. It finally exploded and I must let them remember that I will also put a speaker in my mourning hall to prevent it from running out of power and become voice-activated. When someone comes, play my classic jokes. The children come to see me and kneel down and say, “Dad, I’m here to see you. Are you haunted? It’s too scary. Run away. Have a good trip. Thank you all. I’m Xiaoqi . Bye, Brother Qi has one more light than Maodou, so I think he should have won . Here comes the countdown for Xiaoqi’s ticket lock. Let’s give applause to Xiaoqi again. Xiaoqi is strong in text , and his performance adds a lot of points to him . Then when I was watching him speak, I actually imitated his head shaking several times. Xiaoqi , are you like this usually? It’s the same or it’s a style you have when you perform on stage. When I’m excited, I will shake my body . That’s right. If you take a shower, you just hide from the shower so you don’t get wet. It’s like a rapper. He needs to have his own flow. He needs to use gestures to control and emphasize his own rhythm. Your style is especially suitable for performing in India. You will be more popular in India if you keep shaking your body. Xiaoqi, you are talking about highway tolls today. What other jobs have you done? I actually worked in a photo studio, doing photo editing for children photographers, doing photography design, etc. I also worked as a carpenter . Hairdresser, you are this, your buddy is there , yes, and the clasping of hands is also real. Our predicament is very similar to when we were drinking. I worked late every day in the studio and earned 2,000 yuan a month . He also worked late at the toll booth and was far away from home, so we empathized with each other. How did you get on the talk show stage ? There was one time when I was a legal person and a legal person pharaoh. I was in a photography studio and I opened one. At that time, I lived in the studio and worked. There was only one mattress in my studio. Every day I woke up from the mattress, walked to the workstation and started working, and then after finishing the work , I played for a while and went back to the mattress to sleep. I started a business.
Sometimes I didn’t go out of the house for a week, and I felt very lonely. There was an echo when I spoke because it was too empty. Then I checked the Internet for some talk show performances or activities, and went there. Then I gradually realized that starting to talk about talk shows is equivalent to a process of self-rescue. Isn’t it like saving yourself? Yes , I think he is still far from his best condition this time , but even so, he is still super strong. Xiaoqi is a performer who dares to roll all over the stage, just like an ordinary actor Isn’t it necessary to learn to liberate one’s nature in the early stage? It feels like he was liberated in the womb. This is how I came out. The delivery is mom, here I come. You have been a social bull since you were a child, right? Yes, since you were a child, the drinking tables in Northeast China are all that kind of. Not at the drinking tables of your parents, you are required to stand up and perform. The child can feel the texture of the TV series from his text, just like the very popular “The Long Season” and “Moses on the Plain”. Because on the stage of general talk shows, the Northeast is just a background and an accent , but I think Xiaoqi made me imagine that it is the feeling of the Northeast. Xiaoqi’s article seems to be a very special one , because the Northeast is so special. I believe he is a person with very rich literary accomplishment . He talked about the real estate in that place. That place is actually an empty city. The young people have left and only the elderly are left. That’s all . In fact, you have seen it in the drama before. I have been in Fuxin for four years. Although Shenyang is not that prosperous , I will still be shocked when I enter Fuxin, because the urban environment of Fuxin at that time is indeed relatively underdeveloped. Shenyang has a subway, but Fuxin has few buses. When I entered that city I am not used to this place. The house that I mentioned in my joke Originally, I was going to perform in Chengdu on June 10th, and she was scheduled to go to Chengdu for fun . We hadn’t discussed it. The later stage happened to be recorded during those days , and then we bumped into each other. She said she would accompany me on the trip, and I was very happy. I originally thought that there would only be two eliminations . I accompanied you on the trip. You did it so quickly. My son is so talented. Thumbs up. This is to thank Xiaoqi for his wonderful performance again. We also invited Maodou to return to the stage. It’s really hard to say. They are all very good. Who will enter the next round? Let’s take a look at the scores of the two. This is very exciting and full of suspense. What do you think of Xiaoqi? 40 votes. I think Maodou Mao Douma (bad) 8 votes very close sit a little longer Maodou 278 votes congratulations Maodou into the next round it’s the shield group haunted again thank you brother Dou thank you Xiaoqi 270 votes waiting area waiting for a while tired of playing tired of waiting so good waiting tired 270 is also okay it’s ok the guy who is about to appear is very good and his characteristics are very obvious his jokes are very lifelike and he has such meticulous observation and expression of life itself applause welcome hahaha Cao hello everyone , I am hahaha Cao a while ago there was a big little thing that happened in my house what was it was when I was cleaning my house my wife I dug out a love letter from my schoolbag . What a presumptuous expression. A prince cannot be loved by anyone, right? Of course, it’s not a love letter in the traditional sense. When I was in adolescence, there was a classmate who asked me if I had never received a love letter. I said, “Yes,” and she said, “Then I’ll write you one tomorrow. You should write me one tomorrow , too. ” This doesn’t feel like a love letter . It feels more like a gift-giving exchange . When I was in adolescence, no one actually called me a handsome guy. They all called me fat brother. There were fatter people in my class , but I was assigned the nickname Fat Brother. So I thought that no one would really write me a love letter . I was very worried. So I wrote it the next day. She received my love letter and pretended to be surprised. She said thank you, Fatty, thank you for your love. But I still wanted to focus on my studies. I was afraid that she would do this to Fatty and turn me into a passionate Fatty. Then, in order not to affect her studies , I would have to transfer to another school. I still thought too badly of people. None of this happened. The next day I received this love letter, the only one I have ever received in my life. She folded the letter into a small square , and drew flowers , the sun , and clouds on the cover. She also wrote a line of small words in blue pen. She wrote that she wanted to Pack up the blue sky and white clouds and send them to me. Actually, you said that if you send this, it would be hard for me to prove that I didn’t receive it. You said that this is not practical, so just send these things. Her letter was quite romantic. She said that she liked to listen to the sound of my voice when I speak. I can’t go on if you do this. She said that my voice is magnetic and she hopes to hear my voice every day. You want to do this. Wait, there’s another big one. I’ll tell you. She also wrote that she likes to watch me sleeping on the table during class . She likes to see my pouting lips. She said that the skin of my lips is dry and she doesn’t know what it feels like to kiss it. This letter, I Actually, I didn’t dare to believe it because it was written a bit jokingly , but I didn’t throw it away. I kept the blue sky and white clouds in my schoolbag. It has been almost 20 years. I have always regarded it as proof that someone loved me until I learned to love and be loved. Until my wife found it. We were doing spring cleaning at home. I put a garbage bag on the coffee table. My wife put the envelope on the coffee table. It was obviously a small letter. I felt a thump. She asked me what it was. Wait a minute, I’ll get you a lipstick. I see your lips are a little dry. Husband, when the cat catches the mouse, it doesn’t I would eat it directly. I had to play with it first. I definitely couldn’t tell her the truth . I said this was the only love letter I had ever received in my life. This was proof that I was loved during my adolescence. I definitely couldn’t tell her this. At that time, I really wanted to destroy the evidence. I said I didn’t know what this was . These potato chips, would you like to have some? We don’t want to chat, but we still want to share some Lays . The thin and crispy chips are Lays’ new garlic flavor, “garlic”. I beg you, let’s talk about Lays, okay? Later, she broke the awkwardness first. She said it seemed like a love letter. I said I remembered that there was such a letter. I had found it before. At that time, I wanted to give it to you. It was lost and no trash can was found. Then my wife asked me a question that only a woman who has watched “The Legend of Zhen Huan” 70 times could ask. She asked me whether I should keep it or not. My first reaction was that I could keep it, so I wanted to frame it at home. Later I realized that I probably couldn’t keep it. I was quite straightforward and tore it up in front of her. I tore it into pieces so big that I was sure that I wouldn’t be able to put it back together even if I went to the trash can at night. My wife is so cute. She even said that it would be a bad idea to tear it up . She just said that she was just lying there motionless. No one stopped me. I felt that I really had to make a break with the past . I realized at that time that adult love was no longer a multiple-choice question, but a proof question. I had to tear up this certificate that I had been loved to prove that I loved her. Seeing my wife so happy, I felt that everything was really worth it. It was just a love letter, so it was okay to tear it up. I had memorized it anyway. When we talked about this later, she said that there was really no need to tear it up, you could really keep it. I asked her again, what would you do if I found your love letter one day, and she said you couldn’t find it . When I was talking about this manuscript, I actually had concerns . I was not worried that everyone would think that my wife and I had a bad relationship. What I was most worried about was that my deskmate saw this part on TV and tagged me in the classmate group that had been silent for more than ten years . She said, “Fat brother, you won’t take it seriously, right?” Thank you everyone. I am the sentimental fat brother . Thank you everyone for seizing the last voting time to cast your precious votes for Haha Cao’s performance. Haha Cao’s locked vote channel is open. Because I love Haha Cao too much, I like him very much, but the whole process sounded warm, cute , and a little sad , and then that kind of sour and sweet A sweet story , a sour and sweet story. Because I talked about your expressions and feelings at the beginning . We all felt that energy. It was very cute. Teacher Luo was very happy to listen to it. This is because I was sitting here just now and kept thinking about the script. If it wasn’t for someone as cute and popular as you who told it, others might find it a bit disgusting. But the process of your telling it was extremely harmonious and very likable. I really think the density of the jokes is not enough, because you have the qualities that make people like you, and this matter can easily touch the heart, so everyone listened to it with pleasure. And just now, when Teacher Lu Yu and I looked at each other, we didn’t say anything, but our eyes should be the same. I felt that 3 lights were more appropriate , and 4 lights were a little worse. Then I hesitated for a long time and I thought I should be the bad guy. So I believe that many people will like this when it is broadcast. Haha. Cao said that the fat man didn’t look like a dad, and there was no clapping light. Is the topic too far away from his age ? A barrage above said that it was exactly the same as what I thought. It’s very interesting to share a piece of knowledge with everyone . There is a song that you can search online. The name of the song is “Cold Lover”, right? Thank you Cool lover. The song “Cold Lover” was sung by a famous rapper named Haha Cao . It’s about a man who has a conflict with his lover. He is very distressed and tells his lover all his inner thoughts. But I never thought in my life that I would hear the words “snail noodles” in a love song. He wrote that I was worried that a motorcycle would hit you. I was sitting in the snail noodle shop, smoking one cigarette after another. There was no indoor smoking at the door. We don’t smoke indoors in Changsha. I said it wrong. Then he kept sending you text messages and WeChat messages. Come on, repeat it to us or sing it again. Come on, sing a verse. Come on , sing a verse . pper (rapper), please sing a part of this song. When was it released? I really appreciate the show last year. Didn’t I talk about myself as a rapper in the first episode? After that, Tencent Music and QQ Music went to our studio to sign our album . Studio (studio), yes, this was the first song I wrote at that time. Can we listen to a part of it? This is also a rap, right? Good dry singing, right? Because rap is about a cappella, a cappella, let’s sing a part of it, right? It’s raining outside the window. I hope you are like me. I miss you. I catch a plane in the morning and pass through the clouds. I want to see you. I need courage. I take out a burning heart. You say a few words. I am sad. I acted in a comedy in the play. I didn’t chase you this time. I watched your back slowly go away. My heart was broken. I was also worried that the electric car would hit you. I can’t remember how many times I saw your cool back. I sat in the snail noodle shop, smoking one cigarette after another. I didn’t write it clearly. Don’t blame Teacher Lu Yu. It’s you who didn’t write it clearly. I sat at the door of the snail noodle shop . It did n’t achieve the effect I expected . Maybe I didn’t do it to the best. On the stage, I like to talk about some friends , my wife , and my children. When I talk, I feel that although we are far apart, Changsha is far away from Shanghai , but at that moment she is by my side again , which feels pretty good, haha. When Cao was acting, I might be the one who shed tears throughout the whole process, and his words kept poking me. I said, now he knows that love is not a choice, love is a proof , haha. This article is different. It’s not the kind of article that makes you laugh. It ‘s not the kind of article that makes you explode. It’s the kind of article that makes you smile while reading the whole time . I like it very much. I like it very much. I have received it many times. I probably have n’t written love letters to boys. I have written love letters and I think I have received them. Yes , because I liked a boy very much in high school , so I wrote the love letter and asked a boy in our class to give it to him . Because the boy in our class seemed to be good friends with him, so he asked his good friend to give it to me, and then I fell in love with him . This good friend should have given it to me in the English homework book . I slipped a small note secretly. It was very old-fashioned. It was about the first time I met you, and he praised me for being sunny and funny. I was very funny when I was a child. And my male classmate told me that he already had someone he liked . At that time, I thought, okay, so I took the love letter back, and wrote a very simple sentence on it , like “You are dressed so cute today ” or something like that. It’s so embarrassing to think about it now. Some descriptions about missing you , like when you were not around, I did something today, and then at the end I would say that it would be nice if you were with me. I have written too many love letters. The most important thing is if you are married, especially if you are married, writing love letters is very important. I think useless things and things that happen on a whim are the things that should be done. In fact, we just had a very interesting discussion. No one has stereotyped what an actor must be like. He can have all kinds of styles on the stage. The key is whether he can move people. Let’s take a look. Haha, Cao is in his After the performance, he got so many votes that we need to start the microphone-grabbing camp. Touch the ball. I want to see him touch the ball . The countdown to grabbing the microphone is drawing small balls again. There are so many people standing. Oh my God , there are four people who have initiated the challenge, haha. Cao, your choice is you, rock-paper-scissors. I really don’t dare to choose anyone. I have PTSD (post-stress trauma disorder). Teacher Zhang doesn’t dare to choose anyone, so just play one round after another, rock-paper-scissors, shake and ding-ding, rock-paper-scissors, rock-paper-scissors, and cloth-paper. The finals is still a round-robin battle. The talk show and Ta ‘s rock-paper-scissors are cute, very cute, cute track applause. Please welcome Xiaodie . Hello, everyone. I am Xiaodie . Butterfly. It took me a long time to get on stage because the skirt was too long. So today I will come to complain about plus-size women’s clothing. My size is XXXL (size), the same size as Haha. Cao is tall and strong, and I am not tall , and my size is also very large. In fact, I really hate to tell others my height and weight, but I found that the owners of plus-size women’s clothing stores don’t trust their customers very much. I have placed an order and still asked about my height and weight. I said 156 165 The smart customer service turned into a manual customer service and asked me which one was my height. I said, “Does this matter?” Another time it was even more outrageous. The person on the other end asked me , “Are you 165 kilograms or 165 pounds ?” I went to her store’s details page and saw that the largest size can be worn up to 350 pounds. 10XL (size). This store owner is too generous . I asked her, “Are there so many people over 300 pounds?” The store owner said, “When I was this heavy, I didn’t expect that I could grow to 300 pounds . Don’t set limits for yourself. As a fat person, I can understand her aggressiveness. At the same time, I was really curious about the 10XL (size) clothes. I bought it and tried it on. The style of the clothes was very strange and very loose. I am over 160. People weighing more than 100 kilograms are swaying in the clothes , but the collar is very tight. A person weighing more than 160 kilograms is stuck in the neck of a 300-kilogram dress. I am really curious. How can a person weighing more than 300 kilograms have a thinner neck than me? Who is this dress designed for? After thinking about it , I think it should be a 300-kilogram red-crowned crane or a 300-kilogram enema. Then I also found that the design logic of large-size women’s clothing is also very strange, especially in terms of pants. They assume that the larger the waist circumference , the longer the trouser legs are. That is, when I gain weight, I will also grow taller, so I often need to find a tailor to cut my pants. After a while, the aunt started to ask me why it was you again. I said the pants were too long and she She asked me to buy short ones. I said short ones don’t fit my waistline. She asked me to buy ones with a suitable waistline. I said I bought them, so I came to you to cut them . Then I found that I could get four trouser legs by buying a pair of trousers, and the two extra trouser legs could be used to make two more skirts. Then, in order to buy trousers with a suitable circumference and length, I used my brain and came up with a good idea. I directly bought 170 cm three-quarter trousers and 180 cm seven-quarter trousers. At the most exaggerated time, I started to buy two-meter shorts. I think the main reason is that the models in plus-size women’s clothing stores are all thin people picked from hundreds. Once I saw a live broadcast of plus-size women’s clothing sales. The host weighed only 90 kilograms at most. Seeing her selling plus-size women’s clothing, I suddenly felt that Edamame could also sell weight loss products. That anchor also put a huge fake belly on her belly, then patted her belly and said that I should be about 160 pounds now . Then when I saw her current appearance, her belly was very big and her neck was very thin. There were only three words in my mind : enema . I felt that she was insulting me because I weighed more than 160 pounds. We fat people are just fat, not mutated, not so deformed. I think this enema body shape should not be targeted at our plus-size girls , but middle-aged beer bellies. Then the female anchor put on a skirt with her back to the camera, and then took off her big belly and turned around to say that our skirt pattern It’s so good. No matter how big the belly is, it can disappear immediately. I saw where it disappeared. She put it on the chair next to her. I can’t remove my belly. Can a real belly or a fake belly be the same? I sent a barrage at the time and asked if the assistant could try on this skirt. The assistant should be more than 160 pounds. As soon as I finished speaking, the assistant kicked me out of the live broadcast room. I was really angry at the time. I complained about this live broadcast room. I changed 3 reasons. At first, I said that they were financial fraud and personal attacks, but the report was not successful. Later, I changed a reason and said that they lifted their clothes and exposed their belly in the live broadcast, and the live broadcast was pornographic . It was successful . Moreover, I later found some more outrageous live broadcast rooms. The models of large-size women’s clothing were some men and some foreigners. I think This is too absurd. What kind of clothes ? Why is it inconvenient for her target customers to appear in person? I searched the entire Internet for such clothes. In addition to plus-size women’s clothing, there are only funeral clothes. There should be plus-size funeral clothes . They are already so unhappy about finding a real fat person for plus -size women’s clothing. It’s a bit heavy to find a dead fat person for plus-size funeral clothes. Then I change the tone. Dead fat person. I follow a lot of plus-size bloggers and some plus-size store owners. I really hope that there are some real plus-size girls to rectify this industry . So I was a little sad recently because the owner of a plus-size store I often buy from suddenly lost weight. She lost weight, but it’s difficult for me to lose weight. She sold plus-size women’s clothing while secretly losing weight. She stabbed me in the back. It turned out that she was not naive. I am naive. When I visit her store now, I feel that things have changed and people have changed. When I look at her clothes now , I feel that they are her old clothes that she will sell after she loses weight. The impact is particularly strong , as if Yu Hua suddenly wrote a book called “Dead”. I wrote this joke because I found that everyone seems to assume that the smallest size is the best size , and some people will always say that clothes will not look good if you are fat. In fact, there is a possibility that as long as you are a little fat, designers will start to design clothes poorly. So, let’s not point the spearhead at ourselves , let’s do our best , and hope that those plus-size merchants can make their own clothes well. Okay, let’s stop here. Thank you everyone. I am Xiaodie . Thank you for the applause to Xiaodie . Countdown to Xiaodie’s ticket locking channel. Teacher Luyu, there is a point I want to communicate with Xiaodie. You said in the middle that you see, because that person herself is not actually a plus-size and then She had a fake belly, so you felt angry. I can understand. What you were joking about was that sometimes the platform would block a live broadcast room. In fact, there are many very strange reasons for that mechanism. I think you should add one more joke and turn the blame over. Otherwise, as a listener, after hearing that, I would say that those two people might just be doing a business. In fact, I was quite sad about Xiaodie because I had seen some of her offline videos before. She was extremely outstanding, not just ordinary outstanding. I did not expect that there would be a situation where none of the four lights were filmed. And she was one of the favorites for this season in my heart , but from the last game, I felt that Xiaodie did not seem to adapt to this recording. Then you can recall that Zhou Qimo, who was the ceiling of Chinese talk shows, was also seriously unable to cope with the first round. And Xiaolu, one of the best female contestants in China, was also not able to adapt to the situation. She was not able to adapt to the situation at the beginning. So I believe Xiaodie may have an adjustment period. Why do I feel like you are comforting me ? I am not sad at all. No, I am just telling the truth . This is what I can think of. Because this manuscript is very, very new . I just finished writing it three days ago. Because I don’t know how many rounds I can stay here, I especially want to speak up for us plus-size girls. Yes, because I have really worn clothes with very good cuts , which are suitable for my figure. So I especially can’t stand those who are deceitful. They have a stereotype about fat people , and they think that fat people only have fat bellies , and they don’t consider other things. In fact, it is their negligence. Yang Tianzhen’s women’s clothing is very beautiful. I wear her clothes. I just want to say that the plus-size women’s clothing industry seems to be really passionate about it, but there are actually not many people doing it . So after she lost weight, I actually felt a little sad or worried . I’m afraid that she won’t do a good job in making the patterns in the future , so I want to encourage her by coming on the show. To me, I hope she will continue to do a good job, because I really like this skirt and it looks really good on me. Thank you again, Xiaodie , for bringing us your performance. A talk show can spark discussion among everyone , and everyone can take it as a topic and think about it seriously. This is a good topic for a talk show. Thank you again , Xiaodie. At the same time, haha, Cao is back on the stage . After the performances of the two of you are over, we have to see their votes . Haha, Cao to Xiaodie, please look, congratulations. Haha, Cao successfully advanced. Xiaodie will have to return to the waiting area temporarily. Welcome, I feel relaxed, it’s okay, it’s great , it’s okay, I’m really not sad, I’m pretty. To be honest, I want to change the stereotype that plus -size girls must be more cute. If it were me, I would prefer the millennial hot girl style, the bigger the girl, The more you need to expose your skin appropriately and show your strengths , the more you can get some positive feedback. Yes, I think Xiaodie’s story is worth talking about because I am also a plus-size person. When I was the fattest, I weighed 210 pounds when I was the fat guy. She spoke for her group and did a great thing. This stage is too precious to us. She not only wants to speak for herself, but also for many people. She wants this topic to be seen by more people and discussed more, so that there is a possibility of change. So when I saw her on the stage, even if the votes were not good, she was still very calm and performed her work very completely. I think I admire her very much. Everyone, just now it was the shield , so it is still from the shield. This friend actually left a deep impression on us in the last round because he opened up a new talk show text called Shuangwen talk show. It is said that there is innovation . Applause, welcome Wu Ding. Hello, everyone. My name is Wu Ding. Friends on the second floor have worked so hard. Then I am 27 years old this year. I recently found that some of my peers who are parents around me have begun to force their children to take interest classes. I have a brother who enrolled his child in a children’s expression class. In our hometown, a fourth-tier city, it takes a year. 50,000, I was stunned. It was charged by the hour. I said, how can this be expressed ? Isn’t there a meter? I was very surprised at the time. I said, does it cost 50,000 to learn this thing? If you really want to express yourself, you might as well give it to me . I will teach my child to do talk show, right? You give me 50,000. Don’t tell me, teach him to talk, I can even crawl. We can also do the whole manzai. This thing is good. This thing is ready to be on the Spring Festival Gala. When I was a child, when I was 6 years old, my father took me to the Children’s Palace to sign up for a specialty. He looked at the wall of classes and asked me which one I wanted to learn. I said I wanted to learn street dance, which is very handsome. He said he was really good at math. I said, when did the old man become deaf? I said I wanted to learn street dance, street dance, he said you You are wrong to think so. If you are not good at street dancing, it will not improve your grades. It is useless and it is dangerous. Several people die every year if they dance street dancing well. Mathematics can improve grades and it is safe. Think about it carefully. Do you want to learn mathematics ? Do you want to learn mathematics ? I didn’t know what I wanted to learn at that time, but I knew what he wanted me to learn and he was still unwilling to give up. He saw that I was still unhappy and said, “Listen carefully, this is not ordinary mathematics. This is Olympiad mathematics . Do you know Olympiad mathematics? Ultraman teaches you mathematics . I said I want to learn it. I want to learn mathematics from Ultraman. I coaxed and deceived myself into signing up for an Olympiad mathematics class. On the first day of class, I found out that it was an Olympic mathematics competition. The first question I learned was ” Chickens and rabbits in the same cage. ” The teacher read the question on the stage and said, “Put chickens and rabbits in a cage. First count out that there are 36 heads in total , then count out that there are 100 legs in total. You are asked to count how many chickens and rabbits there are. ” After listening to it, I raised my hand and said, “Teacher, there is a problem with this question. You don’t need to count for this question. ” The step of counting heads ends here. I know chickens and rabbits. I can tell them apart by their faces . Normally, you should tell them apart when you count heads, right? These are chickens, rabbits, chickens, rabbits , chickens , rabbits. What fool counts like this? Heads, heads, heads, heads, heads, heads, heads. They’re all heads . We have to count them all at once. The teacher said, “Student, if you don’t know chickens and rabbits when you do this problem according to your logic, how would you deal with it? ” I said, “First learn about chickens and rabbits. People with this IQ shouldn’t study Olympiad mathematics. Tell them apart from the beasts.” The teacher said, “Don’t worry. Listen to how clever math is solved.” He said, “You can use the hypothesis method to assume that all the heads are chicken heads. ” 3 6 chickens have 72 legs, a total of 100 legs. What should we do if there are extra legs? Put the extra legs back on the chickens. A chicken with two legs will become a rabbit. See how many rabbits you can make. The concept of a complete rabbit is really clever, but the problem is that I was too young at the time and I couldn’t understand. I could only understand the literal meaning when I heard people talk. When the teacher said that a chicken with two legs can become a rabbit, I was lost in mathematics. I thought about it for a long time and couldn’t figure it out. I have seen chickens. I grew up in the countryside when I was a child. I raised chickens, but there were no chickens that could transform. We also killed chickens during the Chinese New Year . In this situation, a chicken was caught and was about to be killed. They said they would take out two legs and put them on later. They made a mistake with a four-legged rabbit . When they caught you, it was clearly a chicken, but it was a little rabbit. So you were eliminated in the first round last year. You have your own artistic understanding. I argued with the teacher at the time and said, “Teacher, a chicken cannot turn into a rabbit.” The teacher said that in this question, a chicken can turn into a rabbit. I said that a chicken cannot turn into a rabbit no matter where it is. If you want to turn, go ahead and change. Anyway, odd numbers change but even numbers do not change. So you were eliminated again in the resurrection match. You have your own artistic understanding. Persist. Anyway, the teacher could not hold on. He changed to an efficient way of communication . “Can you change ?” I asked, “Can you change? ” “My child becomes smart when I hit him. ” I said, “Yes, I can change. If the chicken does not change, I will change. Don’t hit me.” It ‘s really uncomfortable. I hate learning Olympiad mathematics . Moreover, many of my peers around me are taking this kind of interest class. In fact, it is a class that parents are interested in . Your coercive way of learning will only bring pressure and pain. It will only bring pressure and pain. I hate Olympiad mathematics . Later I checked who invented Olympiad mathematics . There is a saying that it was invented by the Soviets. In 1935, an educator in the Soviet Union proposed to combine the Olympic spirit with mathematics competitions and invented the educational model of Olympiad mathematics. He aims to cultivate outstanding talents through this kind of education to promote national development. In 1991, the Soviet Union disappeared. After 56 years of studying Mathematical Olympiad, he only learned the first step of solving it . Thank you everyone, I am Wu Ding . Thank you for Wu Ding’s countdown to the ticket lock channel. Wu Ding called out his last year self twice today because of his art and his insistence on holding grudges against himself. I think it seems that many people may have a very deep impression of his last cool talk show, which is a micro-drama. The talk show, yes, yes, yes, the short play, the one about life relying on imagination. Is this also the reason why Chunchun and Teacher Luo did not clap? It’s because the joke in Wu Ding’s last short play was so crazy that the cash light went straight into the sky to meet the God, so I was looking forward to him because you have seen what he looks like when he is crazy, so for today’s one, I feel a little calmer and still hope that he is too normal, right? Too normal, so I hope he can be a little crazier about the roof being on fire. Do you have this feeling yourself? Wu Ding is actually okay because people can’t be crazy all the time because this topic itself is a more realistic topic . I think I really hated going crazy at that time. I ‘ve learned a lot in training courses . When I was a kid, I learned electronic piano , calligraphy, watercolor painting, math Olympiad, guitar, but I couldn’t stick to any of them because I didn’t like them and I was miserable every day . I think at this time, I have been questioning a lot of that kind of education , but I really like Wu Ding, especially the last time. I think you found the best golden sentence in the world , that is, all the beauty in the world depends on imagination. After I went back, I thought, how could it be so right? That’s why I said that the performance in the last round left a deep impression on everyone , yes , and higher expectations , yes , and I hope that because I took this photo of the light, I hope that he may not be as good as last time, but I hope that he can inspire Wu Ding to inspire something particularly good. I hope to see you in the subsequent performances . I also want to show a different style. Because last time, Teacher Lu Yu didn’t take photos of the lights, but this time she took photos. I’m quite happy that we have collected 4 lights in two rounds. He can remember grudges and remember them very carefully . Yes, he remembers them very carefully. Wait a minute, let’s take a look at Wu Ding’s votes. It’s not enough for 290 (votes). Come on, team Spear, choose one from three. Wu Ding. Now the choice is in your hands. It’s very difficult to make a choice, audience Which one do you want to see? (Cai Cai) Cai Cai, everyone wants to see Cai Cai, okay? The only thing I can do is to help the audience realize their wishes. Okay, Cai Cai, come on, Cai Cai is here. Last season, this actress mentioned the shame of sanitary napkins, which left a deep impression on everyone. She can always find the inspiration for her talk show in the embarrassment of life. Applause, welcome Cai Cai. Hello, everyone, I am Cai Cai . Hello, I am from Guizhou. We Guizhou people really like to eat hot pot . No matter how hot it is in summer, we still have to eat hot pot. As we were eating, we found that the shirts of the men around me began to disappear. This hot pot is not only spicy for the mouth, but also spicy for the eyes. There is less and less meat on the table and more and more on the stools. Sometimes I am scared. Where did the gray vest of the man next to me go? Was what I just ate really tripe? I was a little panicked because I didn’t know how many seconds the vest should be hot, but I was so envious because I think they are so frank because I would be very embarrassed if I just exposed a little bit of my underwear straps. And shoulder straps are very disappointing. Every time I am more nervous , the more they tend to slide down. For example, during interviews and meetings, the straps always fall off at critical moments. And there was even one time when my shoulder straps didn’t slide down, they were the hooks The bra was too loose and fell directly to the ground. It was a thin white shoulder strap. I was in a meeting with a client at the time. It was so embarrassing that I wanted to pretend that nothing happened. As a result, the male colleague next to me quietly came over to remind me that your charging cable had fallen off. Then, just as I breathed a sigh of relief, he bent down to pick it up for me. This was the first time I hoped that a man would not be a gentleman or short-sighted. But when he picked it up and looked closer, his hand shook and he threw it back to me. I felt that the charging cable was leaking electricity. I never understood why a piece of bra cost only one or two hundred yuan, and why couldn’t even the shoulder strap be fixed? Until recently , I started to tell this joke frequently, and then big data started to recommend a product to me called a bra shoulder strap fixing belt . Listen to the name, it feels like a tongue twister. Bra shoulder strap fixing belt. The older sister helps the younger sister pick wheat. Some strange comedy techniques. But I suspected that it might be because the shoulder strap slipped down, so the sales of the fixing belt would go up. Otherwise , what’s embarrassing about the bra shoulder strap being exposed ? Is it because it makes people think of breasts? But aren’t breasts very common? What are breasts? Breasts are scrambled eggs. Scrambled eggs with tomatoes. Isn’t this what you like? I understand. I’m sorry, but I found that if you are not embarrassed, you don’t need to spend money to solve this embarrassment. For example, I have a male friend who works out. He only wears one kind of clothes in the summer , which is a very sexy fitness vest with a particularly large armpit. They all sagged to their hips. My friend ‘s height just reaches his chest. Then in the summer when the wind is very strong, I can often feel the piercing wind from his vest when I walk beside him. When the wind blows past, I can see his chest. I remember one time we were waiting for the traffic light at an intersection. I was on his left and there was a girl about the same height as me standing on his right. A piercing wind blew past and our eyes met . The girl and I were both stunned at the time and burst out laughing. The boy was also stunned when he saw us laughing. He asked me if we knew each other . I said no, we just fell in love and fell in love at first sight. But he was not embarrassed at all. He never thought about whether he wanted to buy a chest sticker. Instead, after a while, he ran to me and shook his chest muscles. He said that he had been training for an hour today and they were about to explode. I really thought he was exaggerating. If his chest muscles were about to explode, they would have to be removed when he went through security on the plane . In this way, the security checkpoint would have to hold two boxes, one for the lighter and the other for the chest muscles. But I am still very envious because I think the boy has a good figure. He can wear a sexy vest, but if If he has a figure like Maitreya Buddha, he will also wear sexy vests. Girls are completely opposite . For example, the two most popular bras on Taobao are one that makes small breasts look bigger and the other that makes big breasts look smaller, right? And these bras are actually very difficult to wear . So the first thing we girls do when we get home is to take off our bras. Then I found that my roommate has changed a lot . She can even wear C (size) in the morning and A (size) in the evening . Including myself , in order to adjust my breast shape, I would wear those gathered bras and lifting bras. I adjusted them over and over again and it worked. I successfully adjusted my breast shape to a flattering type. Then I was C (size). I was talking about my talk show level. In the past, in order to fight against gravity, I would even wear those tight underwire bras. Then when I went for a breast examination, the doctor told me that this kind of bra would compress your body and increase the risk of breast nodules. I know that for boys , there is a bit too much information , which will increase the risk of this, but in fact, he also He didn’t tell me directly, but asked me a question. He asked me what are you wearing. I was confused at the time, so I answered. I feel so embarrassed when I think about it now that I want to scream. I said, “Doesn’t it look good?” The way the doctor looked at me at that time made me feel that the steel ring was pressing on my brain. But in fact, the only person whose brain was pressed by the steel ring was Sun Wukong. Just imagine that if Sun Wukong was a woman, the golden hoop would become two steel rings and wear them on her chest. It would be more suitable for her leopard print skirt. Then every time she shouted, “The fairy eats my stick,” and when she raised the golden hoop , the shoulder strap fell off, and the fairy would say, ” You are the little fairy.” But I want to say that breasts are a part of our body, right? In fact, everyone has them. Men also have them in different sizes . They don’t wear underwear, so they don’t know their chest size . So I’m wondering what kind of method can make us more open about our breasts ? I think if we use it to classify, is it okay? For example, the program grouping by chest size This is the real breakout competition. But if I were to judge by my eyes, I would be grouped with Maodou. But after thinking about it, I decided that it’s still not possible . We can’t define people by their bodies, right? Because if we do that, we’re afraid that we won’t be able to see men’s talents and can only see their breasts. That’s all I have to say. Thank you everyone. I wish you all a happy win. Cai Cai, the ticket lock channel is open . Thank you Cai Cai. Why did I choose this topic this time ? I have been troubled by this since I was a child. For example, when I was in junior high school , I was chatting with a male friend who I was very close to. As we were chatting, I stomped my feet and I found that his line of sight turned into a cat toy. So I really wanted to talk about it, because I want to talk about this thing. I think it ’s what really bothers me, so I want to say that the part about scrambled eggs with tomatoes was really successful. This part , the joke about the teacher was something we discussed with the screenwriter and it was a gift for you . Thank you. I was stunned at the time. I said, is this my gift? My birthday hasn’t come yet. I like it so much. Thank you. My feeling is that girls will have body anxiety. Small breasts want to get bigger, big breasts want to get smaller, and big breasts want to get smaller. Then they have to wear this underwire bra. Then when she went for a check-up, the doctor said this. I think it was a powerful statement she made in her fightback. The steel ring is not actually compressing your chest but your brain. I think this point is particularly powerful. Thank you, teacher. Of course, she has a lot of jokes. Those things that seem to be messy are actually the points where you are a little goblin and really want to take pictures. If you think about it carefully, it is very organized. I want to say one more thing because when I was talking to a female guest a few days ago, she said that when she was a child, when she played basketball, she said that every time she shot the ball, there would be many boys waiting for her under the basket because her body may develop earlier than (other) girls. She said that she was afraid of being seen in front of the basket, so she would stay away from it. She actually developed a very good three-point shooting technique. If you ask all girls, if they are very tall, they must have hunched their chests during their growth, which makes it difficult for them to be very open. Then think about our high cost of living from childhood to adulthood, because underwear is very expensive . You need to find a comfortable, well-fitting and decent underwear . In fact, it costs a lot of money from childhood to adulthood. I think the girls on the talk show stage are very cute. They talk about a wide range of topics and are very bold. I never thought that one day we could talk about women’s underwear together. I never I have thought about it , so I feel a special sense of liberation. Why did I choose the spear? I think humor should be accompanied by some irony. The thorn should be something sharp. I think the stage is the shield and the talk show is the spear . It can ensure that I will not be interrupted or beaten when I speak on this stage . After Cai Cai’s performance, Wu Ding returned to the scene. Let’s take a look at the votes they received after Wu Ding and Cai Cai’s performances. They scored a very good score of 272 votes. Congratulations to Cai Cai for entering the next stage. Congratulations to the new member of the spear group. Finally, there is one person. Wu Ding needs to take a break. There is nothing wrong with my performance. I think I have done everything I can. The result may not be very good, but I have tried my best. Some people say that you are quite unique in the first round . People may have expectations of you. Because the performance or the program is actually a show . In fact, there may have been various problems before , but the time and place are right , that is, the audience is right. But if you didn’t do well in that show, every link of yours may be a problem, so I don’t have any regrets. I feel that he was a little uncomfortable in both shows. Compared with the Wu Ding I saw offline, the charm of these shows is not even one-fifth of that in the theater . It’s a bit regrettable. Many actors are worth everyone to see offline Go and feel their style. To be honest, so now the spear team has to send people to fight. The friend who is about to fight is very interesting. A legal officer who wants to be a screenwriter. Screenwriting is not easy . In fact, legal work is also full of difficulties. Let’s welcome Sun Xi with applause. Hello everyone, my name is Sun Xi. I am a corporate legal officer , the kind of legal officer that talk shows urgently need. In fact, I have been working for more than ten years, but I have never had any sense of accomplishment . Because many years of work experience have taught me a very important truth , that is, the law is solemn and inviolable, but legal work can be. The most devastating job I have ever done was to collect debts in a bankrupt company. We suddenly had more than 200 risk lawsuits , and billions of payments had not been recovered. The leader threw a stack of judgments at me and asked me to collect the debts. I couldn’t accept this work arrangement at the time, so I blocked the leader for three days and wanted to ask him for an explanation. Then the leader said, Xiao Sun , look at your mental state, how suitable you are for debt collection. Then I was exiled to the newly established debt collection department, which is roughly equivalent to the Ningguta of our company. The leader has his own unique understanding of team building, so In our department, there are those who are not favored , those who have made mistakes, those who are big, those who are ugly , and those who are very loyal but have poor brains. Then there was a big brother who didn’t need to come to us, but he got drunk and said that he had learned Taekwondo when he was a child , so he was directly parachuted into our company as a team leader. Then when I was at work, I often felt dazed as if I was working on the crew of a gangster movie. At that time, I was still a little noble because I was the only one in the team who graduated from a 211 university with a master’s degree in law. But you know, when I stood with them, there was no sense of incongruity. Sometimes when I looked at my face in the mirror, I wanted to say, Sun Xi, have you integrated into society too quickly? You are too social. Then you also understand that although we look more rough , we are actually the vulnerable group in the company. I remember that when we asked for debts for the first time, we were very nervous and wanted to ask two security guards to accompany us. We were directly rejected because our company also owed money to others. The security guards had to stay to protect the leaders. And debt collection is really too difficult, especially legal debt collection. Think about it. How can legal affairs collect debts? We have learned so many legal restrictions in our heads that we are very conservative in our actions. You know, every time I collect debts, I mainly use persuasion and influence, and even plead when necessary. Before I did this, I always thought that the one who was collecting debts was the grandson. This statement was just a joke until I met more than 200 grandpas and grandmas. They were all really amazing . Everyone had more than one grandson. So every time we collected debts, we would gather around the grandfather like the Calabash Brothers. Each of the brothers had some magical powers , but no one could get the money back from the grandfather. Of course, we were not so helpless every time . I also had some highlights in my career. One time, our company had to go to another place to collect debts, so they rented a tall truck for us and drove us to the suburbs. We were standing on the truck. That was It was my first time riding in a convertible. I was carrying legal documents as my legal weapons, and the others were standing behind me holding whatever weapons they could find. At that moment, I was so immersed in the role that I forgot that I was a legal officer. I felt particularly motivated. I had to do something big today. Then we were monitored by the police and they said that a suspected gang of hooligans was gathering in the suburbs. I was still quite young at that time and I was a perfectionist , so when the police identified me as a suspected gangster, I was very ashamed. I asked why I was just a suspected gangster? Where did we reveal our flaws ? This statement was too negative about our abilities. It sounded like we were cosplaying. I told them that they were just gangsters , not ignorant of the law. You may not believe me, but I am actually a legal affairs police. They were even more surprised after hearing that. What? There are legal affairs officers in the gang ? Later, the police asked us to register our personal identity information . When I was filling in my occupation, I hesitated. I didn’t know what to fill in between gangster and legal affairs. I never thought that gangster would become one of my career options. At that moment, I was overwhelmed with sadness and remembered many of the teachings of my teacher . Didn’t he say that as long as I studied hard , I wouldn’t have to do this? Then we set out in the morning that day and returned home at 3 a.m. I actually had to go to work the next day. At that moment, I was very angry because I realized that we who pretend to be gangsters have a harder time than real gangsters. Real gangsters only need to come out at night. Have you ever seen gangsters who come out at eight in the morning? Then I worked in that company for a year and a half and almost never got any money. Occasionally, I accidentally got money , but there would be unexpected troubles. There was one time when a debtor was very cooperative and took the initiative to say that he would repay us all the company’s monthly cash flow . I was very moved, and then I received 500. Are you waiting for that ten thousand like me ? No, only 500. He owed us more than 100 million and only paid us 500. I feel that this 5 00 is not for repaying debts. It is the New Year’s money my grandfather gave me. Then according to the company’s regulations , every repayment must be accurately recorded in the debt registration form issued by the head office . But because it was my first time filling out that form, I didn’t know that it was in units of ten thousand yuan and only rounded to integers . So when I entered the 500, it became 0 as soon as I pressed enter. It really rounded to 0. You know, this is the first time in my life that I feel that decimal points are so cruel. It feels like the 500 was forced to jump into the river and commit suicide . There was not even a splash, and even the body could not be found. It was trapped in the algorithm. I was really panicked at the time. I said, how on earth should I explain to my leader? I said, leader , don’t look at it. It is a 0, but actually it is 500. This 0 can be spent. It is called pocket money. What will the boss think of me? Xiao Sun is really good. They have started virtual currency. Then I really had no choice but to fill in the 500 in the remarks column. Then every midnight when I wake up, I always see the 500 and ask me why the 500 cannot be used in calculations. Why is my work so meaningless? I feel that all my efforts are like the 500, which disappears as soon as I return to the car. Finally, I was seriously depressed. Later, I asked myself, Sun Xi, how good it would be if I had known that you spent the 500 ? Wouldn’t you have to report it ? Although the company will be affected by this They accused me of a duty-related crime, but 500 yuan is not even enough to meet the standard for conviction. Although the company will keep asking me for the debt , with the workload of our department, it will take decades before they ask me for it. I can imagine that decades later, a young man like me will find me and say, ” Grandma , it’s time for you to pay me back.” We are all very curious why you only took 500 yuan . Then I told him very proudly that my biggest wish is that this 500 yuan will be seen by others. Then I returned the 500 yuan to him , and he took out the computer and registered the 500 yuan back into the debt registration form. A new pocket money was born. Then I looked at his stunned expression and leaned over. Go and say why don’t you spend it too, just think of it as the lucky money your grandma gave you. That’s it, thank you all. Sun Xi’s ticket lock countdown. Another round of applause to Sun Xi. Sun Xi, why did you choose yourself as the spear when you were grouped ? Because I learned talk show relatively late , and I felt that there were many things I wanted to express and fight back against, things that I had endured for many years. This happened to me 10 years ago . I remember when I watched a movie before, it said that there was no need to endure it anymore, so I wanted to use talk show as my spear and talk about these tragic things. I like it very much. I think she told a movie that was like a black comedy, which reminded me a bit of Ning Hao’s work It’s similar to “Crazy Stone”. So when she talked about some early eight gangsters, I had a special sense of the picture. I thought it was very playful and humorous. There was another point about her that I also thought was very funny. But I don’t know if it’s okay to ask this way. What I actually wanted to ask was Teacher Luo . Because she was paying back the money, right? When she talked about a group of gourd brothers, I wondered if Teacher Luo had some experience with the gourd brothers. Teacher Luo was the grandfather who was surrounded, right? At most, there were more than 100 lawsuits going on, so we had more than 100 gourds , but as people with conscience, we shouldn’t do business , so we are definitely not the grandfather. I think more than 100 of them are gourd grandfathers , and we feel very guilty. But when it comes to the actual operation, sometimes we have to use tricks. For example, when they come to sue, we have a priority in our minds and who to pay back later. But after the lawsuit is over, you may not be able to control the rhythm, but our confidence is that we will pay back everything, yes, yes , but the purpose is not to deny it, but to pay back this family first, so we deliberately drag it out . At that time, they also thought we were quite gangsters, but in fact, there was no so we There were a lot of gourds there , all of them were gourd masters , and we kept apologizing to them , so I didn’t have the honor of experiencing the situation you described, but I guess you didn’t have the honor of seeing our situation either. Yes, I was particularly moved when I listened to your “True Return” later. In fact, when I was collecting debts, the Hammer phone happened to be on the market, and I bought one. At that time, I felt that I needed a Hammer phone, and then I bought T1 (phone model), T2 (phone model), and M1 (phone model) for my mother. So I was sad that you didn’t pat me on the back, but you should have said it earlier. But you are already very successful I feel really guilty. So this is something that only people who have suffered losses can say. Yes, it ‘s amazing. Sun Xi, now there are two lights off on the field because of the Laughing Friends Group , so you should accept the challenge. Let’s see which friend will steal the microphone from Sun Xi. There are two of them. So Sun Xi , I am really familiar with my second brother. I study in Dalian , and he also works in Dalian, so it’s my second brother. Okay , thank you, second brother. Second brother is here. Okay, come on , second brother . Come on, second brother , good evening, everyone. I am my second brother. My main job is a firefighter. Thank you, everyone on the second floor, please pay attention to safety. When I received the call from the director asking me to come up to record the show, I was very excited. You know, this is my first time recording a show. The most intuitive feeling I got was that the show was very formal, whether it was the setting of the escape route or the number of fire extinguishers, they were all very reasonable. You know, I have always been a part-time firefighter, not a part-time talk show host. Everyone got goose bumps when they heard it. Many people suggested that I do it full-time and said that my main job is very dangerous. In fact, I feel that talk shows are not much safer because the treatment for our main jobs is very good. We are all equipped with uniform underwear, panties and socks. They are all uniform. The environment of the distribution camp is also very elegant. Whenever I finish dinner , I will come to our balcony on the 3rd floor. The sunset will make me fall into deep thought. I am wondering which underwear is mine . I asked Maodou, who used to be a navy, if you also have such troubles. He said that my underwear can be used as a sail. Maodou and I are both from Dalian. In fact, Maodou and I are the same. At the beginning, my father also asked me to join the navy. I didn’t want to be a soldier at that time. I was afraid of hardship. I wanted to burn myself with cigarette butts to threaten my father. You know, my father was very upset after seeing it . Why bother? Dad doesn’t understand you. You are not afraid of being burned. You should go to the fire department. You know, I came I have to mention my good comrade Shang in the fire brigade . Why do I call him Shang ? It sounds better than bald . Shang is a very miserable person . You know that our firefighters have a low tolerance for mistakes. If you make a mistake , it is easy to get into danger. Shang got athlete’s foot because he wore someone else’s training shoes by mistake . I handed him a tube of athlete’s foot cream. He said that good brothers should share happiness. He didn’t even think about how I got athlete’s foot cream. You can applaud. You know that we have strict management. After turning off the lights, we don’t allow people to play with mobile phones. One day, after turning off the lights, Shang’s mobile phone vibrated and rang. My captain came in to check the dormitory. He was about to take this kid’s brain and he was leaning down. My captain laughed and said, “You take me for a fool?” The monk also laughed. Maybe the captain was right. His cell phone was confiscated. The monk came to me in a bad mood and said, “Second brother, you are so careless. Why didn’t you notify me when the captain came?” I said, ” I am so careless. Why didn’t I call to notify you?” You know, the monk is the happy fruit of my team. He brings us a lot of happiness. Sometimes he even brings us happiness during our work. I remember one night a large factory building caught fire. After the fire was put out, we attacked with two guns to put out some remaining fire. The monk and I shared a gun and I brought him water. We attacked forward like this. At this time, the monk’s hat suddenly fell off because he was nervous, and then he went up with his big bald head to pick it up. You know, firefighters are very sensitive to light in a fire scene. The water gunner on the opposite side was very experienced and knocked the monk to the ground with one shot. The monk was a real man. He stood up where he fell and went to pick it up. This action completely angered the gunner on the opposite side and obviously added some pressure. The monk stood up with both feet off the ground and cursed him, “Are you done? You are one of us. You know the speed of light propagation in the air is one of us . ” At this time, the water gunner on the opposite side took the radio and shouted to me , “Second brother, you can do it.” No, there is a fire over there. Can you put it out? I said it is the Buddha’s light. Wait for him to put on his hat and it will be out. We worked until dawn that day. When we walked out of the factory, the shooter behind me and the water gunner behind me were calling me . The shooter behind me said, ” Shang Lao Er, I’m sorry. Look, he used a water gun to shoot a rainbow for us. ” I said, “How romantic ! Are you done yet?” You know I have been a firefighter for many years. My family often asks me, ” You have been a firefighter for so many years. Tell us what is the most dangerous and frightening thing you have ever encountered ?” I usually tell them the story. I remember it clearly. It was the night of the fifteenth day of the seventh lunar month , which was Ghost Festival. We received a call saying that an old man was lost while visiting a grave. After receiving the call, we quickly came to the foot of the mountain where the old man was lost. Our captain was extraordinary and formulated a very detailed and thorough plan. He spoke with great vigor and courage. Comrades, listen to my command. We divided the troops into three routes. There were two routes with division of labor. Monk and second brother, you two are in the middle route. There is no road in the middle route at all. The middle route is not easy to push . The monk is in front and I am behind . The two of us traveled through mountains and rivers and I was exhausted. Suddenly, a grave appeared and the monk began to dance with joy. What was going on? I thought I had met a wizard, but as a firefighter, I had to stay calm. I didn’t dare to move at the time . It seemed that I was controlled. Second brother, come and help me quickly. The big spider got into me. I said, you are not a monk, you are a pure demon monk. You know, when it comes to firefighting, I always think that prevention is more important than extinguishing. Now there are many people who don’t have the awareness of prevention or escape. It should be said that now there are many young people. Sometimes they are addicted to the Internet. They like to play games. At the beginning , sometimes they feel that the fire is not very big. He sees that there is nothing wrong. I will finish this ranked game and then leave. If you walk slowly, you will only have a tablet. I remember once I finished speaking in a community and said that smoke prevention is very important when escaping. For us adults, if you take three or four puffs, it will be very dangerous. An old man stood up and said , “I have been smoking for thirty or forty years, and I am still short of your three or four puffs. ” I said, “Uncle, you have to believe in firefighters. ” The old man got excited when he heard that. I don’t believe in firefighters the most. Once I went to a grave and got lost, and the firefighters didn’t find me. Later I came back by myself. When I came back, I was scared because I saw monks performing rituals on the grave. Thank you all, please vote for the performance of the second brother. Let’s give another round of applause to the second brother. Second brother, I really want to know what happened from the end of the first round of the competition to now, because it was the same topic about firefighters twice. I liked it very much last time, but I remember that I didn’t seem to take a picture, right? I didn’t take a picture. I remembered him . I hope that saying these can make you feel better. I didn’t sleep very well when I went back. Thank you. Then today your whole performance was very wonderful. I took the picture without any psychological burden , and I was very happy. In addition, we usually say that talk show actors say whether the punchline is crisp or not. He is crisp even without a punchline. He is crisp from beginning to end . I like his temperament so much. Thank you, teacher . It’s so cute. I want to ask about the most hilarious moment. The first moment that made the whole audience burst into laughter was a slip of the tongue , not a designed one, right? You know I have been a part-time firefighter, not a part-time talk show host . Shanghai audiences are very tolerant of firefighters. Thank you very much. This is called eating screws. His fans are called snail noodles. And that’s great. I think he has the feeling of Errenzhuan. Because I haven’t seen this for many years , it’s very familiar. Because he has a very funny point . When you say something very serious in a righteous manner , he suddenly says to you, “You’re angry”, right ? Then that thing can be reversed in an instant. It’s really funny. Actually, I just want to tell everyone the stories of us firefighters in a relaxed manner, because now many people may have this when they mention us firefighters. They will watch some tragic videos on the video and think that our lives are like that. In fact, in our lives, the feelings between our comrades and our daily lives also involve laughter and joking. In fact, I came on stage to speak just to let everyone see a real firefighter. Maybe many young people will want to join our team. That’s it. I think he used a very risky move. In the middle it was about going to find the old man, and then as I listened it died down. I was like, where is the old man ? Actually , I was distracted for a while while waiting for the old man , but he came back soon. The old man is back, yes, the old man is back. Where did the old man go? I think the second brother’s performance this time was much more amazing than the last time. This time was great . There was indeed a very, very big change. Last time everyone got to know some of the surrounding aspects of this profession , and this time we began to know the joy of being a firefighter and the life between their comrades. Yes, yes, you and Maodou are in a club, right , Maodou, how was the second brother’s performance today? The second brother’s draft was really very, very difficult. The second brother is still working in the fire brigade , and the fire brigade has a mission recently, so he squeezed out a very short time to finish this draft. Today is considered to be very good. Thank you to our club teammates for their encouragement. As a professional, especially when you have to work, plus firefighters are a very special profession. So under great pressure, you produced such a wonderful text, and then had such a wonderful live stage performance. Let’s give applause to the second brother again . At the same time, we also invited Sun Xi to return to the stage. After the performances of the second brother and Sun Xi, let’s take a look at the number of votes of support they received. Please see that the second brother scored so high . It’s amazing
. The second brother got a very, very high 274 votes. Shield won the applause again. Congratulations to the second brother for entering the next round. Sun Xi will continue to wait in the waiting area for the following results. Awesome, part-time firefighters are too explosive. We are incompatible. I am a navy and he is a firefighter. I am even happier that the second brother has advanced. Why is it more sudden? The second brother’s draft did not work so well when he tried it offline. I was also worried. Today’s timing is very good. Timing (timing) Timing is very important. I am even happier for advancing myself because in my heart Maodou will definitely advance. It ‘s really great , but the score is still so low, it doesn’t matter. Every time she shouts with such power on the stage, I can accurately hit the nail on the head. I am a small person who is forced into a desperate situation, a resistance. Because relatively speaking, Sun Xi has not been in the industry for long, I think she will have a long way to go to face these challenges on her own. Dear friends, the first half of the second stage of the second season of “Talk Show and His Friends”, the battle of spear and shield, is over. Meituan Flash Purchase advanced quickly and was one step ahead of others . Next, let’s take a look at the list of advancers for this game. There are a total of 30 places for advancement in this stage. Currently, a total of 12 groups of actors have advanced, and there are 18 places left. The spear camp has advanced 2 people and the shield camp has advanced 10 people. The shield camp is temporarily in the lead. Friends on the other side should keep working hard. Congratulations again to all the friends who have advanced . Those friends who have not performed yet, I believe you can bring us a more exciting stage. We say that talk show is both spear and shield. We hope that the spear and shield will bring new power to our lives. Do you want to come to the scene to experience the joy of offline talk show performances ? New A new round of “Tiaoyou” national tour is about to start. Follow your favorite actors and make a wish. Friends from the city you want to see may appear beside you. The competition is still going on . Keep following us at the same time next week . See you in the second half . Bye bye . Get ready to go on stage. Let’s rehearse again. I just eat well . How can I start smoothly from the middle? Don’t worry about it. Just pick up the words. Okay, you see I eat. I only eat Sunshine Tomato and instant noodles. I only eat Eggplant King. How come I have something else in it? Here you say I’ll give you Eggplant King. Do you want to eat it? I won’t eat it. What I eat is Eggplant King. After all, about one Sunshine Fan is added to each bucket of Eggplant King . Eggplant is sweet and sour, with a real flavor. Tomato is a treasure, the eggplant king . Good, good, hurry up and finish the show and have a few bites. No kidding. Meituan flash sale will be here soon. Thanks for the quick, more than a little bit of the next generation shopping method. Meituan flash sale is the title broadcast . Tomato is a treasure, the eggplant king. Thanks for making an appointment with a sunny tomato. The eggplant king co -sponsored the broadcast to make life happier. Thanks to the national liquor Laocunzhang for the special sponsorship of the broadcast. 96 times the milk golden life aircraft carrier comes from the protective power. Thanks to the a2 Ziyao HMO infant formula that protects the baby’s shining growth for the sponsorship of the broadcast to get back to the state and pulse back. Thanks for calling you anytime, anywhere back Good condition, sponsored by the Pulse industry. Chatting means eating Lays. Share delicious joy. Double gratitude. Crispy slices, endless Lays. Sponsored by Lays. Really funny. Really organic. This program is sponsored by Haitian Organic, which is certified by three parties . Our stage is called the battle of spear and shield. Currently, 2 groups of actors in the spear camp have advanced. There are 10 groups of actors in the shield camp. The 12 with the lowest votes will bid farewell to this stage after this round. Who dares to draw the ball? Really draw the ball. No one takes the initiative to grab it. It doesn’t matter. We also have a very subtle setting called the fate box. “Talk Show and His Friends”. Great. Welcome everyone to the second season of “Friends and His Talk Show”. Each friend group has its own secret mission . Is Xiaoqi’s mission to deliberately be a very bad host? Is your mission to ridicule me? This is our life mission. I found the mission. Haha. What happened to Cao’s mission? Brother Cao , let’s go to the next part. The physical version . You draw and I guess. “Titanic”. Oh, the next one is Bearded Xiang Zuo. Blow air at me. Bad breath. Sit and wait for death. You guys are working on this all day. This thing can’t be broadcast. This can’t be broadcast. Dizziness. I told my symptoms.