何广智再次上演封神表演，上班就是脂肪肝和结节二选一！丨《脱口秀和Ta的朋友们 第二季》 STAND-UP COMEDY2
Thank you, everyone. Hello, I’m Guangzhi. Okay , it’s ok. Thank you very much. You are really enthusiastic. Everyone should be able to feel it. The competition is quite anxiety- inducing. Fortunately , I learned to drink last year . Drinking can indeed make many things simple. I was entangled every day where my talk show audience was. It was all in the wine. I was really happy after drinking for half a year. I went for a physical examination. All the thyroid nodules were gone, and then I got fatty liver. There was no way. I think that now everyone works in such a high-pressure environment. You can only choose between fatty liver and nodules. But you can’t be so absolute. I also have a colleague who will never wrong himself. He will vent his emotions when he has them . He doesn’t have fatty liver or nodules , and now there is no labor contract. I choose fatty liver because it sounds like a rich disease. Our boss has this disease. He usually eats too much because he eats all the talk show cakes. I was also puzzled when I saw the boss’s report. I said, isn’t it our blood and sweat that we paid? How come it becomes oil and water in his hands ? My friend said it’s very simple. This process is called pressing . I also recalled that I asked if pressing is a chemical reaction or a physical reaction. My friend said that this should be reported to the relevant departments. It’s terrible. Thyroid nodules sound like a cowardly disease. It seems that this person is bullied every day and dare not vent. Of course, there are nodules. Friends , don’t get angry after listening to this joke , otherwise the nodules will continue to grow . My colleague Fangfang persuaded me to go for a physical examination because there was a problem with Fangfang’s physical examination report , but he didn’t think about exercising or seeing a doctor. He wanted to find someone to take the blame. There would be no psychological burden on this matter because the act of persuading people to have a physical examination is so good. I want to find out that there is no problem , then I will be relieved. If I find out that there is a problem, then I will be relieved. My physical examination report is better than Fangfang’s, and he is more uncomfortable. He said, “Are you sure you have no problem at all? Did you read the report clearly? Is there a problem with your eyesight? Bring the report to me and let me see it. You see , you still say There is nothing wrong with you. You are just too thin. You are doomed . If you continue like this, you will look better in clothes than you do. You must be curious about what Brother Fang found out that made him so worried . I don’t know about anything else. His conscience must be bad, but I found that I can understand Fang Fang. Why is there nothing wrong with my report? Because I didn’t show him the one with the problem. I was afraid that he would be happy and his illness would be cured. I have mild fatty liver. I found that my first reaction after seeing the report was not to find a doctor, but to find Maodou. It’s enough , it works really well, because Maodou’s body shape must be fatty liver. He doesn’t even need laser scanning for fatty liver . Just scan it with peripheral vision . It happens that peripheral vision can scan it. I’ll hurry up. I called Maodou and said, “Brother, go for the company’s physical examination as soon as possible . It’s not good for your health if you delay it for too long .” He said he didn’t have time to go. I asked him what were the problems in his last physical examination . He said something like thyroid nodules, sinus arrhythmia, and low bone density. I said, “Just these three, just these three, nothing else. ” He had everything . What can I say? After talking to Maodou on the phone, I opened a bottle of wine . I think there is nothing wrong with my liver . Now I only drink with fatty liver . I don’t need peanuts or melon seeds as snacks, just some edamame. Maodou has severe fatty liver. What can I say ? As long as he can still drink, I’ll be fine. He should drink, but I have to be able to drink. I should not live, but he cursed me. You are so happy. Your thyroid gland is bigger again. Edamame has suffered too much damage today. I don’t know if it is because of my age. I am very nervous before every physical examination . I feel that my brain is calling all organs to a meeting the night before the physical examination . All departments should pay attention and show their best condition tomorrow to welcome the inspection. Whoever is found to have problems will be operated on. All departments should clean their own butts, but don’t wipe them all the time, because there have been bloody lessons there. What a mess. But in fact, the company’s physical examination can’t find too many problems because I found that the enterprise physical examination only checks Generally speaking, checking the core organs can be done in one sentence as long as it can guarantee that you can go to work normally. Of course , the standards for going to work in each company are different. Some companies require that there are no problems in the physical examination report, while others require that there are no major problems in the physical examination report. I used to work on an assembly line. As long as you can go for a physical examination, there will be no problem. The package you personally purchased is very comprehensive. There is also a bone density test. The company will not check this because low bone density does not affect normal work . From the perspective of company management, leaders like soft bones. I went to test my bone density at that time. The bone density was a little low, which was a soft bone. Of course, you don’t have to go to the hospital for testing. You can even see it during the usual meetings. Our company is still a conscientious enterprise. In addition to the annual routine physical examination , we even have one more item than other companies. For example, we are afraid that the data of the physical examination institution is inaccurate. Our urine routine is usually done in professional institutions. We are also very cautious. We are afraid that someone will accidentally extinguish the industry with a pee. What the hell is this? I will have regular physical examinations. I have also seen people who don’t have physical examinations all year round. I don’t know if there are such people around you. I knew a rock buddy before. He hadn’t had a physical examination for seven years. I said, brother, aren’t you worried that you haven’t had a physical examination for seven years? He said, it’s okay, rock and roll will never die. I said, aren’t you afraid of getting sick? I’m not sick , it’s this era that’s sick. I can’t talk to you. It’s really hard to imagine what it’s like for a rock player to go for a physical examination . He must not care. If he cares, he won’t be cool. For example, when the doctor measures his blood pressure and says that your blood pressure is a little high, you just say whether you are irritable or not, and that’s it. But you are a rock player and you didn’t find any disease. It’s also very embarrassing. When you use the machine to scan, there is no nodule . It’s not your anger, brother . I really think that the picture is very inconsistent with the usual leather jacket, leather pants, and yellow hair. I am very irritable every day. I want to overturn the world every day. I compare my fingers with the world every day. But after entering, I found that there is a project called digital rectal examination. If you observe, you will find that everyone who comes out of the digital rectal examination has become much more honest. The expression is the same as that of the rock players after “Summer of the Band”. Before going, I felt that I was not successful. Why am I not successful? After returning, I have hemorrhoids inside and outside. You want to ask him what it feels like to have hemorrhoids . Itchy, I quickly bought a new pair of pants. Thank you everyone. He is so good at playing with words. I feel that there should be 290. It’s awesome. Champion (champion), don’t come, don’t turn it into a slogan, turn it into the action in your hand . OK button to confirm. He Guangzhi’s ticket lock channel is opened. Another round of applause to Guangzhi . I was thinking at that time that it was so funny that I asked Wang Feng to go for a physical examination. People asked him, Mr. Wang, have you been tired recently? Now I am a little tired. I originally wrote a “bury me in the spring” joke or something like that , right? I thought there must be these interesting extensions, and then how did they do it ? Why are they so dense? Don’t you think Guangzhi has made a big breakthrough this season compared to the previous season? I think he is going to become an immortal. This person is about to disappear. I think he has super evolved and been reborn. I think He Guangzhi is now a flashlight in my mind. The room is dark, and he shines it wherever he shines, and it becomes bright. Do you know that he only needs to say a word and it will be bright. Why is it that the light is consecrated? How is it so amazing ? Because the things I talked about are actually true stories, they are all true stories . The friend who hadn’t had a physical examination for seven years was here. Brother Tian is Fang Xiaotian, the host of Overload Comedy. He told me that he hadn’t had a physical examination for seven years, so I wrote it in. Seven years is true or false. Brother, is this a true story? It should be eight years now? Last year was seven years . Go and have a look. Brother, in these eight years, there is no need for a physical examination until the ninth year. There is no one left. It’s just too amazing. What’s going on? This person has trypophobia and can’t listen to this. It ‘s too intensive . Guangzhi is very amazing. If you listen to all the talk shows about physical examinations , you will find that other people are the same. He just imitates the process of physical examinations, especially men’s physical examinations. He will talk about, for example, the prostate . That kind of movement will be very funny. Guangzhi is the only one. He just starts from the physical examination and then derives a lot of branches. Then each branch has his expression . It ‘s not only a joke but also an expression. This is very interesting. I particularly agree with what Li Yuchun said
. You think Guangzhi seems to have really evolved to 2.0 In the 3.0 era, he has begun to do whatever he wants. It feels very strenuous to speak without stopping. In fact, have you ever thought about this script? You acted so well. Mr. Luo Yonghao looked at it again and said that you acted so well last time, but you acted so well this time . In fact, I am also very worried because this script has been polished for a long time. It is very likely that the next time it will be very bad. He is an artist of the older generation on our stage . He has been practicing traditional crafts for so many years. Then we have a group of loyal fans of Guangzhi who have always been indignant that he has never won the title of “Big King” . Because in the history of this stage, there are people who have won the title of “Big King” at the same level as Guangzhi , but there is no one who is higher than him. But we, the fans who love Guangzhi, have had a concern for many years , that is, because you have been too successful in the poor track , everyone is worried that you will not be able to keep this poor track after you become rich. If you can keep it , you have to be shameless. So I was very worried. Then from the first game of this season, the tail of last season had actually been transformed. The transformation was particularly successful and explosive in the first game . Then during the break , I told him congratulations because he opened up a new situation. The performance was also very successful. Then everyone knows that Guangzhi is a gentle and humble person, but I don’t know what’s wrong with him. He told me arrogantly that this was the worst one in my script this season. I was bragging, but I was right . So I really admire you older generation artists from the bottom of my heart for being able to achieve breakthroughs in creation , even breakthroughs like a rebirth. This is so precious. And I am confident that after this is released, there may be several hot searches on the Internet. Yes, it must be because the plot is too dense and too advanced. And I suspect that the band Miserable Worship regrets that they changed their name. When I was young, Miserable Worship was called Painful Faith. He changed his name to Miserable Worship halfway through, but after yours spreads, I believe they will regret it. He just changed it to Miserable Worship for the sake of convenience. You won’t sue me for distorting it like this, will you? What we are most concerned about now is whether Guangzhi can advance directly after such a wonderful performance. If he passes 290, he will definitely advance directly. Don’t call out (grab the microphone), that’s stupid. Look at Guangzhi’s votes. This article is a big breakthrough for me , so if it succeeds, it proves that I can stand on this stage without the topic of poverty. 293 293 Oh my god, this direct advancement is too good to be true. 293 My god, the shield is too fierce, the momentum has been played out , that’s awesome , congratulations to He Guangzhi for advancing directly with 293 votes