支原体感染导致死去的亲人来看我？努力35年走出了农村后，是为了接女友回农村的？！丨《脱口秀和Ta的朋友们 第二季》 STAND-UP COMEDY2
Hi, everyone. I’m Ruirui. Thank you all. The competition is too stressful. I’ve written a lot of new manuscripts recently and handed them to the screenwriter teachers. They read what I wrote and asked me to write new ones. The pressure is too great. Let’s just chat. My hometown is a rural area in the Northeast , but I don’t like rural life because the economic conditions are not very good. It rained today when everyone came, right? You know, when we were young, we didn’t even have umbrellas. When it rained , parents put sacks on their children and went out to school. This is true , and I don’t know why parents don’t allow their children to laugh when they are wearing sacks. What a joke , but I like talk shows. I ‘m really not used to it. Another reason is that I spent a childhood full of superstition in the rural areas of Northeast China. When I was a child, I had a fever of 39 degrees. My family asked someone to check me and determined the cause of the disease. It was a mycoplasma infection. My dead relatives came back to see me. The treatment method is also very mysterious. It ‘s called standing chopsticks. Does anyone know it, right? Find half a bowl of water and stand three chopsticks in the water. At the same time, chant the names of deceased relatives. Whoever you chant and the three chopsticks stop, that person has returned. I was beside him and had a fever. Who were they over there? I was confused and thought there was a phone at home. It was his great uncle. It was his great uncle. You stop, his great uncle. Don’t disturb the child. The child is young and can’t stand the tossing. Go away. The child’s health is the most important . I thought to myself, you still know that health is the most important. Whenever you look at me, you should come over and wipe the foam on my mouth. When he chanted my great uncle, the three chopsticks stopped. That must be my great uncle who has returned. Otherwise, how can you explain it? It can’t be that the tension of water and the pressure of air make an axially symmetrical wooden material with a density less than that of liquid stand here. That’s too absurd. My great uncle had no education when he was alive, but he became the representative of the physics class over there. To be honest, anyone you chant can stand. Do you think it’s Trump? He really can stand. Think about it, it’s too dangerous to use this method to treat a child. Fortunately, our teacher was worried about me that day and came to my house to see me. Fortunately, it was him who came. When he entered the house, he was confused and said, “You are making trouble.” Then he picked me up and said, “You have to kneel down to be sincere .” The rural areas of Northeast China are lacking in both material and spiritual aspects . Our primary school is a dangerous building. The kind that leans to the left and right. You have seen too many of those that stand upright. Have you seen a house that is always at ease? Just at ease, standing like this. And everyone knows that its roof is collapsed . When it is windy and rainy, there will be bricks and soil falling on the ceiling. It is very dangerous. The children are sitting in the classroom with their eyes full of dual desires for knowledge and survival. Later, I realized that whoever it hits is not destined to study. Maybe one day it will be windy and rainy , and the weather is very bad, and the roof will crackle. Our teacher is also helpless when looking at the roof. He said that to us until now. He said that the children have We must seize the opportunity and walk out before we finished talking. That day, a group of children stood in the rain and looked at the house that was originally at rest, which seemed to be squatting. I wondered why we had to live this kind of life. You said that children go to school, shouldn’t the school be an ivory tower? As a result, the tower said that the tower said in the wind and rain. I really don’t understand it , friends. I am 35 years old this year. In the past 35 years, I have worked hard to do one thing , which is to get out of the countryside. I worked very hard . I want to live in the city. I hope my child can be born directly in the city. He can see high-rise buildings , buses, subways, and pre-prepared meals as soon as he is born. Because I live in Shenyang , I have barely scraped together the down payment to buy a house. I have worked very hard and now I have established myself in the city. I have a girlfriend whose family is from the city. Once we chatted and talked about what kind of life we will live in the future. She said that the life she most yearns for in her life is to go to the countryside. The whole courtyard must have. I said, Excuse me. me (I ask) I asked her what she wanted to do and she said she wanted to go to the countryside and build a small yard. I said then what, she said to put up a fence, plant some flowers, grow some corn and raise some chickens and ducks. I asked her if she had been to my house before. She said she liked the atmosphere in the countryside and I felt that there was no atmosphere at all in the countryside . She started to beg me and said, I beg you, let ‘s go back to the countryside to live, let’s go back. I said I have worked hard for more than 30 years to come out and pick you up. This is true. I don’t know if there is anyone like her. She has never been to the countryside and she longed for it so much . For a while, I couldn’t persuade her and took her back to our rural hometown. Before we set off , she was as happy as a little sparrow. We set off. As the car went farther and farther, there were more and more mountains around her. She began to be afraid of me. Then she didn’t dare to drink the water I handed her. I received a call on the way and said we were almost there and were ready. After I hung up, I asked her why she was unhappy. She said you love me, right? Because we walked for a long time that day. Later she also found that the environment had changed. She said to me that your village is really shabby. I thought your village was shabby but I didn’t expect it to be so shabby. I quickly comforted her and said this is the town and we haven’t reached our village yet. She said the slogan in your town is well written. I asked which slogan it was. She said it said that the tomato is a Baoqiehuang . I said that for every barrel of Qiehuang, about one Sunshine Tomato is used. I don’t have it. What is sunshine? It’s not easy for rural children to take on business. What are you doing? These are all projects to help farmers. We walked a long way back then and finally got to my home. But as we all know, when you go to an unfamiliar environment, people will be more excited than nervous . As soon as she got to my home, she started to get excited because as soon as she entered the gate, she saw the live chicken running in the yard. She said, “I know this is called a strolling chicken . Strolling chicken is really good. ” But as we all know, the people in rural areas are simple and honest. My mother couldn’t tell whether it was a compliment or an order. That was a strolling chicken. We strolled for the last day and the next day we went to visit my uncle’s house. She said, “Look, my uncle’s house has big geese, and your family doesn’t have big geese. ” As we all know, the people in rural areas are simple and honest. My uncle’s house doesn’t have big geese either. We kept praising each other for the past few days. One day , they were chatting and my mother said to her, ” Thank you for choosing Ruirui.” She said, “Auntie , don’t say that. Ruirui is very good. ” I said, “Don’t praise me, don’t praise me . ” Why did I take her back? I thought that going back would break her fantasy about the countryside, but I didn’t expect that she still liked it after the trip. But I knew the reason was because we only stayed there for seven days. If we stayed longer, we would definitely find it inconvenient. Seven days is also my upper limit and the upper limit of our village. If we stayed any longer, my dad would have to go into the mountains to hunt. I think it’s too late to go out now. I seldom think of my rural hometown when I am away from home . Very rarely. But the time I think of it is when I am unhappy outside and when I fill in my registered residence. Friends, I am 35 years old but I am still quite sentimental. Sometimes I have fantasized that if one day, no matter what I am doing , I suddenly wake up and find myself back in the elementary school classroom. My desk mate will ask me what happened to me just now. I said I had a very long dream. In the dream, I became an adult, walked out of the countryside, and lived in a building . But we didn’t contact each other later. He said, “Then I am more concerned about one thing. Will we use the new classroom for junior high school?” I said, “Don’t worry, you won’t go to school after graduating from elementary school .” He said, “Then how can I contact you if I want to ? ” I said, “Then just find half a bowl of water.” Thank you everyone. I am the champion Ruirui. Ruirui’s ticket locking channel is open. Applause again to Ruirui. Ruirui, do you think this stage has changed compared to the previous stage? I think I will be more confident and relaxed in this game than in the first game. Especially when Sister Xue exploded like that, I was completely relaxed, you know? I just said it casually. With this mentality , thank you everyone. I thank Thank you all for listening, Xiaoxue. I believe that the person who takes over is the nightmare of all talk show hosts. I was thinking that whoever takes over would be unlucky, so I was anxious all the time. I didn’t expect you to turn this over to a level comparable to hers with such ease. It’s great. I’m really, really happy for you. Thank you, teacher. Can I ask to listen to the density and pressure again? Come on, let’s listen to that passage. It’s impossible that under the action of water tension and air pressure, a wooden material with axial central symmetry and density less than that of the liquid stands exactly at the gravity balance point. That’s all. People who have practiced and can walk on the rural stage are different. I’m really happy for you. It feels that all languages are flat and cannot describe my three-dimensional happiness at this moment. I’m so happy for you. You finally have your own stage. I’m really, really happy. I know because since last year, the teacher has said that you are very reliable and really good. I know
until this year. Fortunately, there is a performance that can reassure you two. Thank you for your continued support . It’s great. I especially feel that this kind of gradual accumulation of an actor is very valuable because I have been in the past year . I often see your live broadcasts. Do you also see mine? There are a total of 17 people in my live broadcast room. One of them is me. One of them will be me, so I am very happy to see someone suddenly be able to radiate his brilliance. The feeling of blooming is great. Let me tell you a piece of information. Ruirui was discovered by Guangzhi. Guangzhi regrets it now. He is a little regretful. He was too good. He performed with Ruige last year , but I didn’t accept him. Then I asked him if there were any programs looking for you. He said no, so I recommended him here. But he is definitely better on his own. Today he finally proved himself on this stage and proved that there is nothing wrong with my aesthetics. I want to ask why the praise for Ruirui ended with praising myself. I am shameless. I just like it. Is it not okay, Teacher Zhang? Is it not okay, Teacher Zhang? I am right . I have more or less contributed to this performance. Teacher He, don’t think that with your current status in talk show, is there anything that is not okay? No, you are a teacher. I think the best thing now is for everyone to come and see Ruirui’s votes together . All 4 lights of the Laughing Friends Group are on. Ruirui needs someone to initiate a challenge. Is it Ruirui who can directly advance again? Please see if he has advanced. Advance, advance , advance, advance. Thank you Ruirui for 292 votes and direct advancement. Applause to Ruirui.