第3期上：贾耗全妆上台，“女警察叔叔”惊艳全场 ！丨《脱口秀和Ta的朋友们 第二季》 STAND-UP COMEDY2 EP3
Hello everyone, welcome to the second season of “Talk Show and His Friends” sponsored by Meituan Flash Purchase. The first stage is called the Light Fighting Competition. Before today’s competition begins, I invited an old friend of ours to perform a talk show to warm up the atmosphere and cheer for our friends. He is really an old friend because he is really old . He tried talk show for the first time at the age of 65 last year . Remember (remember)? Then when he left the stage, he said that if nothing unexpected happened, he would come again this year. In order to let everyone know that he did not have any accidents, he did come today. Let us applaud Shanshan Youfan. He eliminated me twice. Hello everyone , I am Shanshan. It was an accident. I am still here. I am more surprised. The show is still here, but I am not here to participate in the competition this year. Let me open the stage for everyone. Opportunities should be left to young people. After all, young people gave me the opportunity last year . Xiaoyu casually said that it was the right age to break through, which made me popular. So if I have to say it, it has to be Peking University scholar, his knowledge changed my destiny. Who can change my destiny? After the program was broadcast, many media interviewed me and almost made me an inspirational role model. Sometimes I feel that one old man is not enough for the talk show industry. Talk shows really need aging. Many time-honored units contacted me , such as the elderly newspaper “Sunset Red” and the nursing home, and invited me to participate in various activities. I found that the track for new and old artists is very narrow. Real old artists are very expensive. New and old artists like me are more popular. I am even a little worried that I have stolen the life of Teacher Tang Guoqiang. There are a total of 5 sharing guests in the late life sharing event . Four of them, the old artists , drove their own luxury cars , and I went by subway. It’s not special , I just simply like the love seat. After the recording was completed, the program crew booked a return flight for me at 7 am the next day. I had to get up at 4 o’clock. I asked if I could be booked It was a flight during normal hours. They said that the normal hours were over budget. They didn’t treat me as an artist, but they didn’t treat me as an old man either. They let me go so early , it seemed that they really wanted to send me away. During the Spring Festival , several relevant units jointly organized a gala to respect and love the elderly. They asked me to bring some warmth and happiness to the elderly. I also needed it , but I still made serious preparations. When I got there, I saw the auditorium full of elderly people singing and dancing, who were much happier than me . I was warmed, so I performed particularly well that day and stole the limelight from all the old men. Many old ladies rushed to take pictures with me, and some even made a heart shape with me, which made several old men faint on the spot. I occasionally participate in other activities, such as the Spring Festival Gala of our local TV station. This is the first time that a talk show has been added to the Spring Festival Gala . The TV station paid special attention to my 5-minute gag and revised it 7 times. I asked if the audience would still laugh like this. The director laughed and said that the script of the program had been reviewed and approved for recording. That day I asked if I could have a teleprompter installed for me. The director said that it was your online program and our TV station doesn’t do these things. If they don’t do these things, then they would be targeting me. I also participated in the variety show “Along the Way of Flowers” and met my idol, Ms. Liu Xiaoqing. I didn’t expect that. I also like her. I was so excited at the time that I thought I was dreaming because Liu Xiaoqing is 10 years older than me and it looks like I am more than 20 years older than her. Really, Sister Xiaoqing shouldn’t have come to “Fan Hua”, she should have gone to “Lang Jie”. For this reason, the program crew even bought me a 1 million personal accident insurance. I went home and told my wife about this. My son in his room somehow heard that Liu Xiaoqing gave me 1 million. I didn’t want to go to work anymore , so I had to run around to take notices and take performances everywhere. As a result, the more I ran, the more energetic I became, and the more I performed, the younger I became. Raising a child really can prevent aging, which is great. My wife’s bestie went to see my offline performance and came to our house the next day In front of me, I told my wife that your old man is very popular. After the show, many female fans lined up to sign autographs and take photos. You have to be careful. Men, especially those who talk show, will be ruined as soon as they become popular . When I heard this, my best friend was over 60 years old and didn’t understand men at all, right? Now some male talk show actors will be ruined even if they are not popular. I quickly comforted my wife and said, don’t worry, it ‘s impossible . I’m so old now , it’s impossible for me to have such a big “good thing”. In the past, I gave my salary to my wife and let her use the performance fee . After the show, there were more performances and the performance fee increased. I found that my wife often asked me to buy things recently. First of all, the family I started with household necessities and later on mobile phones and home appliances. Suddenly I felt like everything I needed at home was on the road where I was performing. In the first half of the year , my house didn’t collapse, but my piggy bank did. I told my wife not to let me buy anything on the way. Why don’t you just place an order on Meituan Flash Purchase? It will be delivered in 30 minutes and we won’t have to wait too long. After all, we really can’t wait for them for too long at our age . My wife was like , “Okay , let’s use Meituan Flash Purchase. We’ll go out for a performance later and you can place an order on the way. It seems that I’m going to run on this road until dark.” The biggest change is actually me. When my wife was interviewed by CCTV News, she said, “I In the past, I was always busy with work, but now I spend all day doing talk shows and don’t care about family matters. He talks more in one performance than he talks to me in a year. After hearing this, I felt very guilty. I started to deliberately talk about topics that interest her and occasionally do some housework. A few days ago, I took her to Yunnan for a few days. How should I put it ? It’s hard for us to be on “Goodbye, Lover” with the relationship we have now, so I want to thank CCTV in particular. During the rehearsal, the director of the program laughed when he heard this and said that it would definitely pass the review if he talked like this. Thank you, everyone. I am Shanshan. Let me give a warm round of applause to Brother Shanshan again. Thank you, Teacher Shanshan, Uncle Shanshan , Brother Shanshan. I have one more question. Why are you only a performing guest this year and don’t have the opportunity to participate in the competition ? You gave it to me last year. You will host it next year, right? Is that what I mean? Bye, Shanshan. Sorry, don’t be angry just now . I was about to thank Brother Shanshan for why he suddenly appeared again. I ‘m not talking about the two of you. It’s just a friendship regardless of age. Who knows? I’m happy to thank Brother Shanshan again for the wonderful opening performance he brought us. Thank you, Shanshan , thank you, thank you everyone. Let me introduce to you again the members of our laughter group this season, the very familiar Teacher Da Zhangwei. Thank you, everyone, hello. Mr. Luo Yonghao , Mr. Lu Yu , and Ms. Li Yuchun, who has just joined this season, are all grateful for your company throughout the whole process. We can analyze how to better deal with life. At the same time, we would like to solemnly introduce our screenwriters. For the entire creation of this program, screenwriter work is very important and helps the contestants with every detail of the manuscript process . Today we have 4 screenwriters, representing Mr. Cheng Lu, Mr. Hai Yuan, Mr. Niao Niao, and Mr. Fang Fang . Welcome everyone. I would like to specially introduce the managers and representatives of various talk show clubs across the country. It is because of the excellent management of these clubs that fresh blood can be continuously injected into the talk show industry , allowing us to see more young people shine on this stage. Let me introduce to you the Comedy Union Box, the National Flowering Talk Show, the Comedy Comedy , the Comedy Fan, Xi’an Likes Talk Shows, Laughing Comedy , Kunming More Than Just Comedy , Comedy Overload, Comedy Club, Ningbo Blue Stem Comedy, Si Xiao Comedy , Kudos, Funny Workshop, Suzhou Comedy , Funny Circle, Talk Show, Wuming Comedy , None of Them Are Cool, Comedy Jia Mi Comedy, Fun Listening Comedy, Shangke Comedy , Dan Liren Comedy, Welcome everyone , and we also control the stay or departure of each of our talk show actors Welcome to the 260 audience friends at the scene. Let me introduce the rules. Friends , this season’s show has a total of 300 votes. After the PK competition, the friend with the higher number of votes will advance, and the friend with the lower number of votes will enter the waiting area. If the votes are tied and both people have more than 200 votes, both people will advance. If both people’s votes are less than or equal to 200 votes, then both people will enter the waiting area. There are a total of 42 qualifying places in this stage. After this stage, 17 groups of friends will leave the talk show stage. Special note: Use the wait light in this stage. Each guest has only one chance to use this power . Currently, Mr. Luo Yonghao and Ms. Lu Yu have already used this light. Mr. Li Yuchun and Mr. Da Zhangwei will use this power in the second half of the competition . Okay, let’s stop talking nonsense and get into today’s competition. The first two players to compete are the first to appear. Last year, he made a huge breakthrough from being eliminated in the first round to entering the finals. So from last year to this year, I don’t know how far he has run in the beauty track. Applause, welcome Jia Hao . Hello, everyone. I am Jia Hao. Welcome everyone. Welcome everyone. The program has begun again. Summer of talk shows The day has come and I have also come with my own makeup. I would like to report to you all about some changes in the new year. The first is that I started to try wearing a headset during performances this year. The reason is very simple. First, I think the new year can give me some new ways of performing and new challenges. The second is because when I used to perform offline, many people said that I looked like Hu Doudou. Every time I heard this, I really wondered what you were kidding (as if). I am so much taller than him, so why am I just joking? The second change is that everything changed after I told the beauty makeup jokes last year. I can understand why some people call me sister, and I can also understand why some people call me beauty blogger teacher , but why do some people call me sister teacher ? I tolerated this until the night before yesterday when someone called me talk show Liang Long. Some audiences also sent me private messages , especially boys who sent me private messages to consult about skin care, foundation, makeup, etc. I think brothers can do it , but you have to be mentally prepared. It’s really not easy to get used to learning makeup at the beginning. When I first learned makeup, I was startled by the lipstick marks on my thermos once . I wondered which green tea girl stole my black tea, and then I realized it was myself. Now I have become the only actor in the entire industry who has to go on stage with full makeup for every commercial performance . The only thing that must be done is: In the future, when people ask me who has the greatest influence on your comedy style, it’s Mao Geping. Now I always say that it’s my mentor, Mao Geping , but if Estee Lauder and Dior are willing to teach me, I am willing to betray my mentor. My principle of makeup now is very simple. As long as I put on makeup, I must be seen by others. I went to Harper’s Bazaar before, and someone put on a very good makeup for me. After taking pictures that night, I immediately took a taxi to the open mic. I didn’t write a single joke that day, but I just wanted to see the audience. I spoke very coolly that day , but I looked very good. When other actors came up with jokes, I took pictures . Some actors also ridiculed me and said that I dared to come to the open mic without writing jokes now . A bit pretentious. What do I mean by a bit pretentious? I put on full makeup . Now I occasionally live broadcast my makeup, but the time period is very awkward. During the day, you are all at work and no one is watching . At night, after I put on my makeup, I don’t know who to show it to. Have you ever had the pain of putting on a good makeup but not knowing who to share it with? One night, I really put on a good makeup and I really had no choice but to go find my neighbors Haiyuan and Guangzhi in the same community . They opened the door in the middle of the night and saw that I was fully made up. I was also very panicked. It was the first time I had such thoughts. I thought to myself , these two men are really cheap. They didn’t let me in that day because they said they were sleepy after 10 o’clock. Actually, live broadcasting makeup is also I would feel ashamed. I was afraid of being seen by acquaintances. I was afraid of being seen by elders. Once, an acquaintance and elder saw Mr. Luo Yonghao. I don’t know why Mr. Luo watched me put on makeup twice. I felt that Mr. Luo was thinking, why does this straight man Jia Hao like to put on makeup so much ? I thought to myself, Mr. Luo, why do you, a tough guy, like to watch others put on makeup so much ? The feeling of mutual shame is really like when you were a child, secretly putting on stockings at home, and your father came in wearing high heels. But Mr. Luo is very good and immediately gave me a big gift. My first reaction at that time was really, Mr. Luo , please leave quickly and don’t let the creditors see you rewarding the male anchor. And you are putting on makeup during the live broadcast. Your steps for makeup are constantly advancing. Everyone sees something different when they come in. You can understand that, right? So that day, a girl came in and said that Jia Hao didn’t know how to put on makeup at first glance. He didn’t even know how to apply loose powder . I had just finished applying loose powder , and then she kept applying loose powder. She was like a fan of loose powder. I applied loose powder three times for her that day. By the end of the photo shoot, I felt like I was not doing comedy, I was doing Peking Opera. When someone else entered the live broadcast room, I applied loose powder three times. How thick was the powder? Later, a buddy came in and lit a cigarette in front of me. My face exploded. Apply loose powder three times . I can understand the steps of exchanging information , but why did a buddy come in that day and I saw a boy wearing makeup and he was always brushing his lips. You felt like he was lost. I really hope that the friend who was brushing his lips will have his career and stocks fall. Because no one stipulates what boys should look like, right? No one stipulates what girls should look like. I think there are definitely similarities between the two. For example, I can shoot a basketball in the air and then put on lipstick. I even think that boys who like to play games and girls who like to wear makeup often complain about the same thing: “Oh, why am I stuck again? ” They are similar. I am slowly realizing that I am the weakest when I am without makeup. Now when I put on full makeup, I am simply Niu Hulu Jia Hao But Niu Hulu Jia Hao also couldn’t handle the suggestions of some viewers. Some viewers really sent me a private message saying, ” Brother Hao, I saw you putting on makeup on your live broadcast and found that your stubble was a bit heavy. Do you want to get a laser hair removal operation?” I thought to myself, wouldn’t that be a step further? Some people also said, “Do you want to teach all the male talk show actors how to put on makeup ? ” If you look like this, you will accumulate virtue. I thought to myself, this is accumulating virtue. In my mind, what does it mean to accumulate virtue? In the future , if there is a middle-aged man telling vulgar jokes at the dinner table, I will go over with loose powder and say , “Brother, you are too oily.” Of course, I have also been questioned before. I have also been questioned before . Some people said that you are taking shortcuts when you just told the makeup joke. You are just… In order to please some audiences , I admit that I did a little bit at the beginning. But if you say that to me again now, I don’t quite understand. Let’s listen to this data. I now have 9 bottles of foundation , 17 tubes of lipstick, and more than 30 brushes. I put on makeup more than 80 times last year. Is it possible that I am simply addicted to it ? Is it possible? So I was also wondering why you put on makeup. But when I went home to teach my mother how to put on makeup during the Chinese New Year this year, I seemed to have found the answer. My mother asked me to teach her how to put on makeup, but she didn’t follow the steps you told her at all. She often went to play mahjong after putting on foundation without even putting on makeup. It made me anxious . I never thought that when I get anxious, I would also I was saying something I hated so much. Where ‘s the Niang Niang Niang powder? My mom was shocked. A Sichuan auntie used TVB’s (Hong Kong Wireless Television) method to express the essence of makeup. She said that the most important thing about makeup is to be happy. Thank you everyone. I’m Jia Hao. Thank you champion. I’m really impressed. My God, it can be opened like this. Jia Hao’s ticket countdown is on. Warm applause to Jia Hao. The first person I want to ask is Chunchun, because she was taking pictures of the sofa the whole time. I feel like I can be shocked all day listening to this opening joke today. Where is it that is shocked ? It’s his whole rhythm , and then each of his links is linked together. Then I observed that the light that Teacher Da and Teacher Luo took pictures of was Niang Niang . Sheep, Pleasant Goat and Big Big Wolf,
and then I and Lu Yu sister filmed the falling part, which was so explosive, and I watched it on the screen last year, I didn’t feel it so directly, so when I started today, I wondered if he drank fake wine today, but I don’t think so. I think he is gradually upgrading and evolving in his style, and I think he is getting more and more comfortable and calm in mastering the stage. Yes , Jia Hao has a drastic change from his previous performance. I think he is getting better and better anyway, because the exquisite boy is getting better and better every day, isn’t he such an exquisite boy ? Are all the mosquitoes flying into the house double eyelids, right? That is to say , you can write the jokes so densely , and this is very, very powerful, very powerful. Don’t you feel very happy when you write it yourself? I feel like I can think of this and that , and I have a coaching team since last year, which is Haiyuan, Guangzhi, and Luo Ming and Xiao Luo. They are my coaches . I didn’t announce it last year, but this year I can praise them early. Brother Hai is still It’s really amazing. Thank you Brother Hao for your affirmation. I feel that I am very happy and moved for Jia Hao after watching his performance today . Many people will think that Jia Hao has improved this year compared to last year , and last year was better than the year before. But in fact, many people may not know what Jia Hao has paid behind the scenes, because he is a very, very hardworking actor . Whenever he returns to Shanghai and has time, he will go to open mic and change the jokes. Sometimes he pretends to come to my house to play games with me for a while , but in fact he wants to talk about jokes. He is always thinking about this. I think if an actor wants to improve, he must learn from Jia Hao, and he will definitely gain something. Thank you Haiyuan, thank you for coming to Luyu, Jia Hao is very capable. I think he has already started cheating. Indeed , there was a detail just now that you may not have noticed . His opening was a bit hasty and the tone was high. If it were someone else, and the confidence on the scene was not strong enough, the rhythm would be messy later . But Jia Hao is very capable, he can totally stand up to it, and in the end it was completely explosive. He has the kind of enthusiasm for stand-up comedy that newcomers don’t have, and he is still there. Every offline performance is full of passion , and he is still writing jokes. His texts are getting more and more solid, and his performance has found a rhythm that is most comfortable for him . In the words of teacher Lu Yu, it is called how to say it. Brother Hao is one of the actors who goes to open mics most frequently, so I think those who feel that their talents are buried should first increase the frequency of open mics with Brother Hao. Shoot in the air and put on lipstick later. I have been touring for more than a month. My main show is called “Jia Hao and Guo Guangwen” . It should have been performed in 16 cities and 18 shows. There are about 15,371 audiences. You are the only seedling in Sichuan and the light of Sichuan. Teacher Jia Hao has always represented Sichuan actors. He has been struggling outside to give us young actors the opportunity to go on stage. Today I started to have a runny nose . I ‘ve been receiving intravenous drips for three days , but it hasn’t healed completely . My throat has been hoarse all the time. Now I’m just like that little medicine jar. Let me give applause to Jia Hao again. Thank you, Jia Hao. Take a break . That ‘s great. Thank you, Jia Hao . This friend who is going to PK with Jia Hao is participating in the show for the first time . She was a police officer from Yunnan before. Applause. Welcome, Hotpot. Hello, everyone. I’m Hotpot. I’m a full-time talk show host now. I used to be a police officer in Yunnan . I worked at the police station on the China-Myanmar border. I’m 36 years old . How long have you been doing talk shows ? One year . Do you have any other skills? 3 kilometers (time taken) 12 minutes and 13 seconds. I hope that everyone can hear my voice , see and accept me as a person. I think that’s good. Sister is so handsome, right? Sister is so hot (so handsome) (So beautiful) Hello everyone, I’m Hotpot. Let me introduce myself. I used to be a policeman in Yunnan. I used to be a policeman in a police station on the China-Myanmar border. That’s right. Since the boys are talking to you about beauty, let the girls talk to you about handling cases. Our station usually has a lot of business. In fact, I’m a very lively policeman , but I find that the people who report cases are usually more lively than me. When the people who report cases come to me to report a case, they start with hello , “Uncle female policeman” . What a strange title. Today I want to tell you about my police story. I have wanted to be a policeman since I was a child because I like Jackie Chan ‘s works. I want to be a policeman like Jackie Chan. It’s so cool. I never take the stairs. After graduating from the police academy, I got full marks in cross-country and fighting. I went to the police station to report. When I was running, someone said that a male policeman and a female policeman were running together. The female policeman couldn’t keep up. That day, I put that person on two laps. Every time I ran next to him , I ran faster into his ears . Man, actually, I thought that if I performed better, I could arrange for a very cool senior brother to lead me. The figure of Daniel Wu had already appeared in my mind . As a result, the senior brother who led me looked exactly like Taiyi Zhenren in “Nezha” . He was from Guizhou and spoke with the sound of the angry Bodhisattva. It’s our Yunnan, Guizhou and Sichuan Jesus Christ. How come there is a sister who can run so fast? Oh, let ‘s go and take you to the police. When I heard that, I knew it was safe. I was going to join the Mekong River Operation. As a result, my senior brother took me to catch chickens. The locals invited guests to make roast chickens. The chickens ran away and they couldn’t catch them. They called the police and said that the reporter was very anxious. The water was boiling and the guests had arrived. They wanted a fast-running police officer to go . What’s the use of running fast? Chickens in Yunnan can fly. Who can catch a flying chicken? The chicken flew over the border and flew into Myanmar. My senior brother stood on the border with his hands on his hips. I don’t know why a motorcycle lived in the throat of the middle-aged man. The chicken on the motorcycle went abroad. In the end, I let the drug-sniffing dog go undercover as a rural dog to bring it back. Then during that time, our station discovered my talent. The cases assigned to me were all about the cow being lost, going to find the cow , the child being pushed by the pig, going to catch the pig , and the pig falling into the manure pit. It was so painful to fish the pig out . How come I, a policeman , specializes in cases involving animals? I have been strong since I was a child , but I also love to cry. Every day, I watch other police officers go out to solve big cases, and I can’t help crying and eating rice noodles in the dormitory at night . People are really complicated. How can they be sad, greedy , and narcissistic at the same time? I took this photo while crying and eating rice noodles. When I looked in the mirror, I found that my god, I felt so broken, but I didn’t want to be a broken policeman. I wanted to be a policeman who solved cases . A few days later, it was the Water Splashing Festival. The police station arranged for my senior brother and I to be plainclothes officers to maintain order. My senior brother saw that it was my first time to participate and said that he wanted to maximize the experience. He rented me a Dai skirt and made myself a vest . Have you ever seen Taiyi Zhenren wearing a vest ? The two pieces of cloth can only be placed on it . When the wind blows, welcome. The key is that my senior brother didn’t understand. He rented me a fishtail skirt and I couldn’t run away. We were splashed badly that day. My senior brother only remembered to rent the costume and forgot to buy a water gun. We could only spit, but I suddenly saw a man filling balloons with water and using them to hit girls. He was not satisfied. He ran to a girl, unzipped her collar, stuffed the water balloon in, and slammed it. It was a good festival, only animals would do such a thing . Coincidentally , I am a policeman who specializes in handling animal cases. At that time, I raised my leg high and went out, but at the same time I heard a click . I thought it was over . The Dai costume turned into a cheongsam, but at that moment I felt a kind of power. I grabbed that The man was pinned to the ground and all the water balloons were stuffed into his clothes. Have you ever played whack-a-mole? That day, I felt that it was great for a woman to wear a police uniform. She could do a lot of things. But I was wearing a Dai costume at the time. No one knew I was a police officer . Several sisters were behind me. My sister was so handsome. My sister was arresting me. Are you serious? In fact, I cried that night. The Dai costume paid 700 yuan. I thought I would keep handling cases like this until one night, a caring citizen called the police and said that a man had drunk too much and stripped down to his underwear, and was acting crazy in the green belt on the street. When my senior and I arrived at the scene, there were green light strips on the green belt on the street. A young man in his 20s was dancing the peacock dance in a green light . I was shocked. Why do people in Yunnan dance the peacock dance when they are drunk ? It fits the stereotype too well. I pointed the camera of my law enforcement recorder at him and took a picture of him. I would show all our leaders what the real impression of Yunnan is at the handover meeting tomorrow. Then we asked him to come out quickly, but he refused. He said his real identity was the Peacock Princess, and the one in front was not He jumped in front of me in the isolation belt and stretched out his peacock hand to peck my head. Sometimes the police also want to call the police, but I suddenly found that this person didn’t smell of alcohol. I thought that he didn’t drink too much, but was poisoned by eating mushrooms. It was more in line with the stereotype. I was so scared. He took out a Hulusi and started playing it the next second. We quickly dragged the Peacock Princess to the hospital. Sure enough, he was frying mushrooms at home alone. He took a bite. After a while, his kitchen door opened and a peacock came in riding on Yang Liping and asked him, “You, you, you want to dance?” No wonder the peacock dance is so confident. In a blink of an eye, I have been working for 18 years and have won many awards and banners , as well as third-class merit. I found that I don’t need to be a dragon . I can be myself and still have my new police story. Thank you everyone , I am Hotpot . Hotpot ‘s ticket lock countdown. Hotpot’s self-introduction is very direct . I called myself (used to be) a policeman , yes , a policeman from Yunnan. You hope to let everyone have a preliminary understanding of your status as soon as possible . After reporting this, the audience did not run away, right? Those who ran were arrested immediately. There will be those who come to report to me. Reporting on the scene is too funny . Okay, come on Chunchun likes it very much and likes it very much . Yes , because I think she is very handsome at the beginning. First of all, the image of a female police officer like this Because I feel very familiar with it. First of all, there are many policemen in our family. My father is a policeman , and I have two cousins who are also policemen. In fact, my mother’s career plan for me at that time suggested that I might be a policewoman in our family. So I naturally have a familiarity and a sense of familiarity with this profession . And just now when I was listening to her sharing her stories, I felt very vivid. Especially when she talked about the Water-Splashing Festival , I felt that this is something I can relate to in my life. For example, in the name of blessing, especially men to women , or as a reason or an excuse , they would express a blessing to you, which is actually very rude and cross-border. So when she was talking about that part, I felt very special. And her behavior also made me feel very happy. It was a very enjoyable and refreshing feeling. Thank you Chunchun for sharing . I think everything is good. It ‘s very interesting. Everyone was stunned by her aura and her handsomeness at the beginning . And the pecking at her at the end was very funny. If this program is over, I think in the future when someone says “sister kill me” I say “sister” Peck me and then peck me to sister. This should be her first TV show. She definitely stood out as a heroic young woman. And then as a policeman, I actually agree with you. Maybe you will just dabble in it in the future because we understand that the China-Myanmar border is such a special place. There may be many things that you may not be able to talk about on this stage, but there are many other things that I think can be shared. Please perform more . Thank you , thank you everyone. Thank you. When Jia Hao returned to Taichung, we found that this group was indeed very eye-catching. Jia Hao returned to Taichung and quickly put on makeup . Let’s take a look at the number of lights in the Laughing Friends Group 40 to 20. After the audience voted, Jia Hao and Hotpot had the highest number of votes . Jia Hao was the champion. How do we win? First of all, congratulations to Jia Hao for getting 296 votes. Jia Hao entered the promotion zone. At the same time, we also have to congratulate Hotpot for getting a good result of 234 votes in her debut. Wait a little in the waiting zone. It feels like if you have to participate in a battle that you are bound to lose, how would you fight? I wanted to cry at the beginning, but I felt no regrets after I finished speaking. It was the last time I said on the stage that I (used to be) a policeman, but it was really super cool, that’s the feeling. Then the next group will have a 1V1 The PK is between Daguoshou and Bu La. The first one to appear is this one, who is quite familiar to everyone. She spends almost all of her time thinking, so she doesn’t have much time to go to work and make money, so she lives a relatively poor life. Then, as she became poorer, she made herself laugh at her poverty. What the hell? Applause, welcome Daguoshou. Hi (Hi), hello everyone. I’m Daguoshou , a philosophy student. I haven’t worked for 5 years . It’s not that I couldn’t find a job , but I found more. I found self-worth and the meaning of life. I borrowed money from friends. Although I have no money , I must rent a two-bedroom house, one for bedroom and one for studio. I have a principle that people can be without a job but not without a studio . Without a job , you are a scoundrel . Without a job, you are an artist. The house is very shabby and cheap, but I am very satisfied with it. It’s cold in winter and hot in summer. Winter is frozen property and summer is not frozen property. I have all movable and immovable properties. Although I have no money, I am very stubborn. Before, an institution asked me to be a success lecturer. I was so poor , what did they like about me? I felt that success was desperate. He promised me 1,000 yuan an hour, which made me very tempted, but I studied moral philosophy. My major requires that I cannot lie and must be truthful, so I didn’t go. So what is true? I was really short of money, so studying really hurt me. I found that some people are poor, not only because they have problems with their abilities, but also because of their attitudes. They deserve to be poor, and their poverty is full of certainty . Although I didn’t earn this money , I felt very free. Kant said that freedom is not what you want to do , but that you can choose not to do what you don’t want to do. My friend asked me what if you want to travel. I said, “I can see you didn’t understand. ” Kant said that freedom is not what you want to do, so freedom is not what you want to travel, but that you can choose not to travel if you don’t want to travel. He said, “What if you don’t want to travel?” To be honest, I didn’t understand, but I kind of wanted to travel, of course I didn’t go. The way the poor satisfy their desires is mainly through abstinence. This is not nonsense. There is a Stoicism in philosophy that believes that happiness does not come from material abundance but inner satisfaction. I thought to myself that I was really a born philosopher, so I continued to study it. When I flipped through the pages, this school of thought was gone. I guess it was probably because of hunger. When you die, your stomach is empty and your heart is extremely satisfied. You die of satisfaction. But this is something from a book after all, so I wasn’t scared until a poor friend fell ill and was admitted to the ICU (Intensive Care Unit) overnight. I was a little panicked. Am I too poor ? Is this kind of life secure? What should I do if I get sick ? Should I pay him back? I did n’t pay him back and it wasn’t much, so I helped him forward the Shuidichou campaign and raised enough money in three days. I was no longer afraid of getting sick. Life has its own way out. If he can do it, so can I. Moreover, I can raise money if I want to, and I don’t have to if I don’t want to. I’m not worried at all. I feel very chill inside. (Chill(轻松)) Water dropChill(轻松) I explored life in this chill(轻松) state. I started trying talk shows in 2023 and went to other places to participate in competitions at my own expense. I didn’t have money for accommodation, so I asked in a women’s item idle group if there were any sisters who would let me stay on the sofa for a small fee. I hoped someone would contact me, but if someone really contacted me, I would be a little scared. I was afraid that she would pinch my kidney. I analyzed it rationally and found that I could survive with only one kidney. The hotel cost 300 yuan a night. It was really terrible. I was just thinking about it . She sent me a WeChat message. I’m going to a concert. I’ll leave the key outside the door for you. You can just treat it as your own home. I think she is a good person. It would be even better if she could take me to a concert. Although I’m poor , I feel very secure because of friends and strangers. Because friends and strangers have given me a lot of love and lent me a lot of money. I’m really lucky , that is, I met this group of friends. Later, after the show, I paid off my debts. My creditor is also really lucky, that is, I met the talk show and his friends. Last year, I talked about studying philosophy, riding a motorcycle , and dating musicians . Some netizens scolded me for being a rich second-generation pretending to be poor. They The scolding sounds nice and sounds like a blessing , but I don’t agree. They always think that only rich people deserve freedom , and say that financial freedom is the real freedom . In my opinion, conditional freedom is not the real freedom, and unconditional freedom is the real freedom. What is unconditional poverty? If you want to be poor, you will be poor, and if you don’t want to be poor, you will be poor. After serious thinking, I found that poor people are suitable for studying philosophy, because poverty makes people think . The wisdom of philosophy is infinite . Some people who study philosophy are poor, and some people who don’t study philosophy are also poor. The world has always been poor. There is a report that only 0.33% of the people in the country are rich , that is, only 33 out of 10,000 people are rich and wealthy , while we are poor. I don’t envy wealthy families because wealthy families will decline, and poor families will exist forever . You are welcome to join the poor, especially young people. Everyone is poor, but the poverty at the age of 20 is relative, dialectical , and structural. Don’t be afraid. At the age of 20, your health bar is thick and your parents are still young and don’t need your care. The society has no expectations of you because no one expects you to. Although you don’t have capital , you have the capital of poverty. So don’t be afraid to be bold and poor. Show the courage of poverty , and you will find that when you embrace poverty Even when you are poor, poverty will embrace you . Isn’t it quite inspiring? The success theory just took a fancy to me. Originally, I wanted to give everyone financial freedom at the end . After some reflection, I thought forget it. It’s not that I don’t want to give it , nor that I don’t want to not give it, but Kant said that when you don’t want financial freedom, you are free. Thank you everyone, I am Da Guoshou. The countdown to Da Guoshou is on. Applause again for Da Guoshou. The style is the same as last year, but it is funnier than last year , and the whole level has gone up a lot. Because people like her who usually lie down and daydream when they have nothing to do are particularly suitable for this industry and can produce endless permutations and combinations. So I liked Da Guoshou very much from the first time, and I look forward to her growing into a. How should I put it? Actually, I was very sad when Niao Niao didn’t perform much later, because there are many completely nonsensical jokes on our stage, which are also very good, and there are many interesting narratives based on life experiences , which are also very good. But at the same time, I also really hope that there are more smart people on this stage , and they can think about who is smart and who is not smart . Don’t talk about this . It’s smart. The direction is different . Teacher Niaoniao just cue you. I was also surprised by this joke . In fact, she changed a lot herself after the script reading. So Da Guoshou’s creative ability is really very strong. I’m happy for you. Thank you Niaoniao because I have a good relationship with Da Guoshou. Then I watched her step by step. She was very anxious at the beginning, and then she presented this script very well on the stage. I’m very happy for her . Finally , I have one sentence : Poverty will always exist. Poverty will always exist. I follow Da Guoshou on social media , and sometimes I watch her live broadcast. You know, I am very conflicted inside. On the one hand, I am very happy, but at the same time, because I like your style so much, I hope you will keep talking about this kind of content. But I understand that there is not much time left for Da Guoshou to talk about poverty. Thank you, Teacher Luyu , but don’t worry. I will become better and what will happen. I hope you will live a good life. Now I am also doing the job I had before I went on the show , with a monthly salary of 1,600 yuan . I teach some people who like philosophy part-time. I think in this process It is possible that other people’s thoughts can feed back to me , and I need a salary of 1,600 to help me balance the hustle and bustle of the world of fame and fortune . The great thing is that everyone has a different feeling when reading this kind of philosophy book. Every time I read this kind of book , I always want to make up a joke . Before, could I make one? Could I tell one ? It was very unfunny , but I tried. Do you know Nietzsche? I was reading Nietzsche’s book for a long time. Do you think the name Nietzsche sounds like a Henan person ? Guess what Nietzsche said? Guess who said this famous quote. It’s okay . Your jokes are really not comparable to those of the great masters. No, my buddy also supports the Stoic school very much . I am very Understand, I understand very well. As an old generation, I will say one more sentence , one more sentence, right? Just one sentence. After Guangzhi’s poor life, reading more books is a good way to create and seek breakthroughs. Okay, Mr. Luo, you sell books in your live broadcast room, right? Yes, I’ll go buy some. I’ll go buy some and read them hard. You can also buy my classes. Let’s thank the big master for his performance again. Let ‘s take a break. The friend who is going to compete with the big master is a very contagious actor. She wants to share a special experience with us on today’s stage. Applause, welcome , Bu La, how are you? I’m Bu La , Bu La. Let me talk to you about something that happened recently . To be honest, recently I’m quite distressed because I received a bad review after a performance a while ago. An audience member said that I looked vulgar. I always thought I was cute but I didn’t expect that I was a vulgar little cutie. And usually they just said I wasn’t funny. Even if they said I wasn’t good-looking , I could tolerate it . Wasn’t it a bit too much to say that I was vulgar ? I don’t even know what it takes for a girl to look vulgar. I searched for vulgar girls on the Internet and all that popped up were men or women imitating men. I thought it was over. He wouldn’t say that I looked like a man, that was too dirty. Last year, I was cast in a skit based on my appearance. It was a very serious skit that mainly reflected some phenomena of workplace bullying. I told my mom that day I said to my mom, “I’m going to act out a skit about sexual harassment in the workplace. ” She immediately got nervous and said, “Then don’t be at a disadvantage. If someone touches you, slap them.” I said, “Mom, I’m the one who touched them.” When she heard that, “Then don’t be at a disadvantage. If someone comes over, slap them .” Their camera teacher came out to explain the scene to me. He said, “Teacher , wait, this is your first scene. Okay , it’s an eye scene. Wait, the male lead will come in through this door. You start harassing him with your eyes, you know? To harass him, your eyes should be full of desire , aggressiveness , and dirty. To describe it in one word, I know the male gaze. ” He said, “Teacher, you understand a lot. Let’s start right away. Okay, 321.” Action (begins) I just finished and as soon as they shouted “Cut”, I knew it was over. I saw that the male lead was about to finish because he was standing there in a daze and couldn’t follow my scene at all, so he didn’t know how to act at all. When he saw me standing there , he came over and bowed to me respectfully. He said, “Teacher , you just acted so well. Are you a graduate of a professional school? Did your teachers in school teach you those things just now ?” I said, “No, it was taught by some old people in society.” My director was completely conquered by me and said, “Teacher , God has blessed you with a good life. Will he look for you in future dramas about sexual harassment in the workplace?” I said, “Bless you . What kind of life should I give you ? Prison life would be the best.” This drama was filmed but not broadcast because my scenes were all cut out. It doesn’t matter because I can understand that and I really think that those who engage in sexual harassment in the workplace should all be cut out. Okay,
thank you everyone. I’m Bu La. Let me
give a round of applause to Bu La. Thank you. At the same time, we also invite Da Guo Shou to return to Taichung. Let ‘s take a look at the two talk show actors. Their final votes are… Congratulations to Da Guo Shou for entering the promotion zone. Come on , thank you. The next group will have a 1V1 The PK is between Gao Han and Xiao Siye. Gao Han and Xiao Siye are about to appear. His performance style can be simply summarized in one sentence: the living are slightly dead. Applause, please welcome Gao Han. Friends , and friends upstairs. Good afternoon. My name is Gao Han. Actually, I am a rich second-generation. My father is a chicken farmer and raises 10,000 chickens. People in the village call him the Chicken King , and some people call him Mr. Egg. As the son of the Chicken King and the Chicken Prince, I think chickens are very pitiful. Chickens have no human rights. In order not to waste feed, we will eat the slow-growing chickens. Small-scale chicken farming does not require this, but our chicken farm is a large one . Large farms have to implement the last-in-first-out elimination wolf culture . This wolf culture makes me eat chicken every day. It is not an ordinary wolf culture. It is a weasel culture . I eat chicken every day. I was in the first grade of elementary school. My desk mate asked me , “Gao Han, what day is it today?” I said, ” I don’t know what day it is for you. Anyway, every day is Thursday for me.” I was so crazy that I wrote diaries called “Diary of a Madman”. I opened it and saw two words written on it: ” Eat Chicken ” . My classmates were really jealous of me and hated me . There were always villains who wanted to harm the chicken-raising prince. After class , a classmate came over and pointed at me and said, “Did you put hormones in your chicken feed?” I was stunned and said , “No, ” but I panicked. ” That’s right. What’s wrong with hormones ? Chickens love to eat vegetarian food .” I asked the chicken , “Can I put some hormones in your feed ?” The chicken said, “Put it in , put it in, put it in. ” I know you want to deduct money from me , but my dad said that this pun can be said. Mr. Egg allowed it . It was 2006. That era was amazing. Our family could raise chickens to feel superior , to feel proud , and to get bird flu. All the chickens died. Dead chickens were worthless because the villagers didn’t dare to eat them. The villagers didn’t dare to eat them. All the chickens died because my dad didn’t know how to cure them. He used a folk remedy at the time and put eggs in the chicken feed. I asked, “What’s this for? ” Eggs are the chicken’s babies. What do you want the chicken to do after eating them? The chicken said , “I ‘m full. ” All sorts of messes. The chicken questioned my dad, and the chicken asked , “What did you put in my feed just now ?” My dad said, “It’s baby food .” Letting the chicken eat eggs is like what happened in “Investiture of the Gods.” The Jichang and Bo Yikao? I said, Dad, you, the chicken king, are King Zhou. We went bankrupt overnight. Our family went from Brahmins to a poor family. I wanted others to donate to our family, but there was no channel. There was no water drop in that era. Chill (relaxation) is so funny. My dad really doesn’t know how to treat. He doesn’t have any medical knowledge. He learned how to give chickens injections in four days and how to give chickens medicine in four days. He is the kind of 4+4 , so he can’t treat . He went bankrupt overnight. So I think life is really impermanent. Many things are unpredictable. If it weren’t for the avian influenza epidemic , the chicken prince would not be here to please you ordinary people. He just told the truth. I don’t care too much about this competition because I think the talk show king is as vain as the chicken king. What’s the point of being a king? They all ran to the other side. Some kings don’t do talk shows anymore. Some kings can’t even do talk shows. There is only one Hu Lan left. He is played like a monkey by capitalists in the stock market. The king of the opposite show is even a “monkey”, so I really don’t understand. My friends wrote for this show until they were exhausted and vomited blood. I said , what are you pursuing? Even if the program group told me, he said Gao Han This year I will let you be the king. I will only say one thing: yes . I love it when I am fit to be the king because I will not lose myself because of it. I know that all this is just an illusion. The moment I become the king, I will definitely think of the most glorious time of our family. In 2006, my father won the highest award in the chicken farming industry, the Golden Rooster Award, at the Gaolifang Town Breeder Commendation Conference. He was the best breeder of the Golden Rooster Award that year. I saw that our chicken farm was very large, so I felt that it would never collapse. But that day I heard a few chickens coughing in the chicken farm. I have never heard chickens coughing. I only I’ve heard penguins cough on QQ (social software). What does this mean? This means that I have a connection with Tencent since I was a child . Then the chickens started to shed feathers like crazy. Our chickens are raised on a suspended rack. They are white-feathered chickens with white feathers. When I entered the chicken farm, I was shocked and said, “Oh my god, it’s snowing.” The first snow in 2006 was a heavy snowfall in our chicken farm. Ten thousand chickens died overnight. My dad didn’t sleep that day. He stayed in the chicken farm all night. The next morning I went to find my dad and said, “Dad, is there still hope for our lives? ” My dad said, ” There are chicken feathers. ” Thank you for talking about this. Gao Han is awesome. Let’s go to Gao Han to lock the tickets. Let’s applaud again to Gao Han and Shao Gang. I wanted to say this just now. You were watching the show happily just now. There were two or three minutes in the middle where I experienced the most difficult two or three minutes of a show like “My Life Record”. What happened to you? I was getting some water from the back and accidentally knocked down the Meituan sign. Then I panicked and sweated a lot because his performance was average last season. I thought I might not be able to take photos of the lights. Then I wanted to make it clear at the end that this was not something I could take photos of. I sincerely apologized to him and even bowed. I bowed even at the cost of exposing my bald head, and then I did a lot of such thoughts , and he turned out to be very powerful and competitive , and then there were one joke after another, and finally I felt that this seemed to be God’s will. I want to say something, Gao Han, I want to do this, I give up these 10 votes and let Teacher Luo bow to me, just kidding, no (don’t), sit down, you can’t spoil this child, sit down, what a crap, sit down, first of all, don’t, teacher, do n’t, I’m kidding, I have a better suggestion , that is, I will keep these 10 votes and bow to you, that’s it , I’m so ashamed, too stunned, crazy, Gao Han, suppose the person who just PKed with you was Jia Hao, who do you think would win between the two of you? Because Brother Hao is like this, his performance rhythm is very mature, while my rhythm is relatively unfamiliar, and when I go up to him with an unfamiliar rhythm to follow his mature rhythm, I can’t catch up, and the audience is a little annoyed with me, they feel that you are speaking too new. Teacher Zhang, Brother Hao Gao Han, he didn’t say this privately, he said in the dressing room yesterday in front of several other new actors , “I want to beat Jia Hao this season, I heard it, can you tell me what you said yesterday ? Actually, the Jia Hao I said I wanted to beat yesterday is of a relatively small status, can the program team arrange for us to fight each other in the next round , can we fight each other, have you ever been pecked by a chicken when you were a child ? You, Gao Han, go to the side to have a rest for safety. I quickly ran and left. Gao Han looked very carefree and indifferent, and he was particularly arrogant . But he performed very well one after another, so Gao Han felt very amazing. So Gao Han felt very amazing. I want to 1V1PK with Gao Han. What’s wrong with the name? It sounds very impressive, but I don’t know if it’s as the name suggests. Applause, please welcome Xiao Siye . Hello, everyone. I am Xiao Siye. Thank you. I am a poor second-generation. I am renting a house in Shanghai now. Two days ago, my roommate suddenly told me that he felt that living in Shanghai, a place like steel The reinforced concrete pigeon-shaped house is very depressing to live in. I want to live in a sea view house. I said, “Don’t just chat, keep drinking. I think this kind of house is good. Because I come from a small mountain village. When I was a child, the house I lived in was too dilapidated. Standing in the house, you can see that all the raw materials for building this house are exposed. Stones, mud , and reeds. The whitewashed walls can’t be called white . The white walls are not only rotten, but also damp and moldy. Especially in the rainy season, there are new ootd (daily outfit) on the walls of my house every day. Every day I want to send them TD (unsubscribe). In order to cover these rotten walls, my father will also paint them up. I can understand pasting old newspapers and so on, but what I can’t understand is that he would post some inappropriate idioms and allusions . Perseverance , I said to my father, our house is so shabby , do we still need perseverance? You are really a wicked person. But it won’t last long after pasting . One layer after another will rot. My father pasted a world map on top of perseverance . When I was 10 years old, I found that the world was rotten. The wall was not only rotten, but also had many cracks. So my house was loved by animals. There were not only mice in this house, but also geckos , scorpions, centipedes. They were foreign to my house. Centipede personnel and weasels also often came to my house . Although animals There are many things , but none of them can be missing. Because I later found out that geckos eat scorpions , mice eat geckos , and weasels eat mice. Can you believe it? There is a food chain in my house. But my dad often breaks this food chain and catches scorpions and fries them to eat. When I first saw it, I was also shocked. I said, “Dad, if you eat scorpions, what do geckos eat? ” My dad said, “It’s okay. Geckos can eat mosquitoes. I have arranged everything. ” So we often eat scorpions at home. They are indeed delicious. When I grew up, I realized that scorpions have always been very expensive. Now I checked and found that they cost 600 to 700 yuan per catty. I dare not calculate it. I am afraid that if I calculate it, a family of four will eat up a house in Shanghai in more than 20 years. It is indeed too shabby, so I cannot bear to read some Versailles literature . For example, when I was studying the text “Praise of the Humble House” written by Liu Yuxi , I couldn’t understand it. I asked him how it was shabby. He just said “This is a shabby house” and didn’t say what was shabby about it . He then said “The grass outside is green as the curtains, but that can’t tell. How is your house shabby ?” Right? If your house is really as shabby as mine, can you hold back and not say a word? Towards the end, Liu Yuxi himself doubted it and asked “What is shabby about it? ” I said, “Yes, I also want to ask you, what is shabby about it? Why don’t you come to my house and take a look? My house is too shabby. I think it would be better if Liu Yuxi came to my house first and then… When he went back to his house, he couldn’t write “Praise of the Humble House”. He had to come to my house first . When he went back to his house, he said this was “Ode to the Afang Palace”. Of course, please don’t get me wrong. I’m not proud just because my house is shabby . That’s not what I mean. I still have low self-esteem living in a house like this. I only play with classmates from the same village because they in the same village already know how shabby my house is and they all live in high-rise buildings. But when they come to me, I still feel a little inferior . Although they won’t say my house is shabby or anything like that , I know they just see it but don’t say it. So I don’t want anyone to come to my house. But I didn’t expect that one day the English teacher would suddenly pull up a TV and say, “Come and fix the TV. My dad can fix the TV. I think it’s really embarrassing to let the teacher know that my house is so shabby. But I think the teacher should just know that this family can fix the TV. He may not know that this is my dad , right? So I said, “Teacher, you’re here to fix the TV too , then you fix it first and I ‘ll leave first.” As a result, the teacher said, ” You have to queue up when your dad fixes the TV for you. ” I said, “Yes , there’s really no need to queue up, so I’ll get in front of you.” I originally thought it was miserable for me to live in a house like this until one day I heard my dad say that this house is not my home and that my family has no house This house is from my uncle and he loaned it to us. I was so discouraged by this shabby house at that time. I said, “Dad, what do we have in our house ? Is this bed ours? Isn’t that the cabinet either? ” I said, ” Please stop talking about it. I ‘m starting to feel uncomfortable now .” I said, “You’ve been working hard in society for so many years, what have you achieved ? It’s not that you’ve only achieved me, is it?” So I’ve always wanted to have a house of my own to live in. I’ve also been urging my dad to build a house. At first, we didn’t build a house because we didn’t have money. But after we had money, my dad didn’t build one either. He was always hesitating whether to build it in the village , buy one in the market town, or just buy one in the city after collecting a down payment . So can you imagine? We’ve lived in that shabby house for so many years because we had too many choices. But two years ago, my family finally built a new house in the village. It was indeed a little late to build it. It was meaningless for you to give me the toy car I wanted when I was 8 years old when you were 20 years old. The house I wanted is like a canned food and it will expire. Because the villa in Shanghai that I want now , it’s indeed a little too late to build it. So I actually have some complaints about my dad , which are reflected in the fact that, for example, he always urges us to get married, but I don’t want to get married. I totally have Reason to respond to him : If you don’t get married, what should I do if I can’t hold my head up in front of relatives and friends? Then just be as self-abased as I was when I was a child. I’ve finished. Thank you all champions ! Great! The countdown to the locked votes for Little Fourth Master! Another round of warm applause ! Great! My favorite part is the part where Little Fourth Master angrily criticized Liu Yuxi. It was so amazing and brilliant. It was so vivid! Did the four of us take the photo together? As for his “What’s so low about it?” You know, I’ve always had a thing that I don’t know if it can be considered a bad taste. I particularly like to reinterpret all the textbooks and all the knowledge we learned when we were young. I particularly like those stalks. And I think Little Fourth Master is the first one . You basically won me over from the very first sentence. You basically have been getting more and more explosive since the first stalk. I think this is a very amazing point . There is a kind of singing called kneeling down when you open your mouth. The first sentence is explosive directly, and he has this effect. But what’s even more amazing is that because he catches you in the first sentence, he will be even more amazing afterwards , right ? And his homophonic puns are not low (low-level) at all . He has two homophonic puns in the middle. What’s low (low-level) is right , right? Not low (low-level) at all. What’s low (low-level) is over. I want to say one more thing. This is a very rare big competition between the poor second generation and the rich second generation . In the history of talk shows, the poor second generation usually wins . Is it because the audience on a large scale will feel more accepting of the poor second generation or something? I don’t think so. Today , although Gao Han is a well-deserved finalist in my mind , I still think he is slightly inferior to him. So in this sense, I want to warn you that there is not much time left for the rich second generation players in China. If you don’t work hard, you will be completely eliminated by the poor second generation. Yes, very awesome. Thank you. When did you start performing ? Yes, how did you start ? At first, I thought I might not be able to find a good job after graduating from university. Then I liked talk shows very much, so I wanted to try to tell talk shows. But I was in Shanghai at the time and was a complete newcomer. I didn’t have the opportunity to go on stage. Then I have to thank the boss of Sixiao Comedy for discovering you. He told me to apply for the job, which was to check tickets at the door and give me the opportunity to go on stage. Yes , so thank you Sixiao Comedy. Thank you. Is the house good now? Yes, my family built a new house two years ago. It was actually the biggest worry of my first 20 years of life because I spent the first 20 years of my life in this house. Today I’m going to show you the old house where I’ve lived for twenty years. You need to take a three-hour high-speed train and then take a bus to the next town, which takes about two hours. Because our town doesn’t have a high-speed train or a bus station , my dad drove a three-wheeled motorcycle to pick me up in the next town. It takes another half an hour or forty minutes on the three-wheeled motorcycle to get to our village. That’s it. This is the house. Because there is a mountain over there , it is the only way out of the village. You can see that there are gaps everywhere , so it is very easy for mice and various animals to crawl in. Did you know that there was originally a bed here , where my dad and I slept ? I’m sure that old people all hope to get married early, which is equivalent to completing my lifelong event. That’s what the old people think. As soon as I entered the door, my dad might have thought that the wall was too broken, so he put our award certificates and calendars on it. My dad has also lived there for twenty years. He didn’t install glass on the window for more than twenty years . Have you been on other online programs before? I was on the fifth season of “Talk Show Conference” three years ago. Was it an audition or did you enter the program? After entering the program , did you go through a round of elimination? Yes, my performance was very poor, so I can’t remember clearly, so it’s normal. Did I have it that year? No, Teacher Da Zhangwei was there. Yes, I knew it was here . I waited for a long time. I said, why are there so many lights when I walk on this land ? Do you remember? I called this car and it’s here. Is it the master ? There is no tail number , but I have to say it. That ‘s right, and then that and that , we can’t say that today’s progress is not as exciting as today. In fact, it was because we didn’t explain it well at that time. We were just starting out, right? It was one year at that time, the first year , yes, less than a year, so the teacher didn’t clap your lights for you at that time, right? Yes, you said the key point . Let’s say that I am the only one left here, so I started to tinker with the past things. Is it okay? There will be opportunities to clap lights in the future. I hope to borrow your good words. I especially want to hear what our Mr. Gao Han thinks. In fact, as a colleague, I listened to Xiao Siye’s open mic two days ago . I feel that if he put the “He Louzhiyou” segment at the end, I, as a colleague, think his votes may be higher, but I was afraid that he would beat me, so I didn’t tell him. I think Gao Han doesn’t understand creation and technical exchanges very well . Yes, he doesn’t know manners. The two of you are here. Please stand in your seats. Let’s see the votes. Their votes are pretty good and they are quite satisfactory. Because I was hardly nervous. It was better than I thought. But actually, I feel that my jokes were not as good as last year’s. But my condition may have improved. No, it cannot be like this. Wait , wait, wait, the lights are four votes short. Four votes . Great teacher, you used your wait light. Yes, I must congratulate Xiao Siye Gao Han for entering the promotion zone. Applause to the two of you. You do n’t have to go in. You can go down. Gao Han is too , he reminds me that being disliked was a kind of pleasure for me in the past . Gao Han’s jokes woke me up, and I felt so bad. He directly gave you an unreasonable one . The Northeast Bankrupt Literature is so powerful. There are chicken feathers. Then, Xiao Siye, it’s the first time I see four words that can light up four lights. The feeling of two “lunatics” when they meet is that their brains may be a little stupid , but their personalities are smart and have a sense of humor. They are just the most real people because talk show actors are always bickering with each other, always mean to each other, and always mocking each other off the stage. Then I want this hope of the whole village , because the hope of the whole village , because he kind of bumps into me. I am the hope of the whole village. These two rural people, will it work? I must get rid of him . There is only one rural person on the show. What is your home called ? Is it the town? Not
the village ? What village? Qiaohe Village, Xialou Town, Lingbi County, Suzhou City , Anhui Province. Then you lose. I am from Group 1 of Yong’an Village. I am better than that village. We call it Hulutou Village. I have another administrative unit below the village. Anyway, I am also the lowest level in the village . It’s not that you don’t have me. Rural Liaoning Province , Group 1 of Yong’an Village, Gaolifang Town, Tai’an County, Anshan City, Liaoning Province . What do you grow on the land ? Wheat and corn. Our family grows corn and rice. Is there any comparison between them? The wheat-rice dispute is about “rice”. No, the two people who are about to PK are Ji Chi and Wang Ying. The first one to come on stage is this new friend from the comedy who can talk and laugh. Let’s invite Ji Chi from Guangdong. Hello, everyone. It’s our first meeting. My name is Ji Chi. Thank you , thank you, thank you. I call Ji Chi. First of all, I would like to thank Gao Han’s family for raising me. Thank you , you ‘re welcome. This is the first time I step on this stage. I would like to ask the male friends here , brothers, how did you find that you are not good-looking? You haven’t found it yet, right? Let me recommend a little trick to you . How did I find out? Some time ago, I posted a selfie on that social media, and many sisters clicked in to see it and tagged them. The sisters who came in to see it left three words: “Your husband ” . The sisters who were tagged would also tag you back: “Your husband” . I was kicked around like a ball, ” Your husband”. Arranged marriages in the 21st century are quite strange , right? Really, I’m an ordinary person, and I envy those very special contestants. I envy those actors with very high or very low academic qualifications . They can introduce themselves right away and say “I’m from Peking University , from Jiaotong University , from junior college”. After hearing this, the audience will all say ” I’m from Guangdong University of Finance and Economics”. You see, silence is the second-tier university tonight. No one respects this second-tier university , you know? Really no one respects it. When I told my dad what university of finance and economics I got into, my dad asked me if I could issue invoices for him. No one respects this school. In this school, I studied a very niche major called real estate development and management. I thought I had joined the job at that time . This kind of applied discipline in the second-tier university teaches very pure things. They really teach you how to sell a house. After you have completed nine years of compulsory education The contrast of selling houses right after entering university was too great. Before the college entrance examination, I was still reciting the same old story . When I entered university, I said that 30,500 per square meter was nothing , and it would make all the poor people in the world happy. Later, there was no other way because friends who are familiar with China’s real estate market also know that our major can be said to have collapsed. It was cancelled the second year after I graduated. My major is really amazing. A major can also end in failure. Later, I had no choice but to take the postgraduate entrance examination to improve my academic qualifications. When I got the philosophy exam, I said why the poor should think critically. When I got the philosophy exam, my dad went crazy. My dad mocked me every day and told me every day that philosophy is good, just like real estate, and they are all superstructures . Philosophy is good , and you can’t find a job in the future, but you can still be self-consistent. I can only persuade my dad, I said it’s not like that, don’t be so materialistic, right? We think about problems from a philosophical perspective. That’s how Hegel thinks. Without it , it is a kind of possession. I said, Dad, do you understand what I mean? My dad said I Without you as my son, I can understand that philosophy and real estate are difficult to integrate. One is pure, and the other has a smell of money. It is difficult to imagine. Socrates was doing philosophy and real estate at the same time. How do others ask questions? Others went to him and asked him , “Mr. Su, what are the answers to the three major questions in life ?” Mr. Su put out his cigarette and said, ” Location, location, and location. ” It’s that kind of feeling, right? It’s very uncomfortable. There is no way. To be honest, I took the postgraduate entrance examination to improve my academic qualifications, but now I’m looking for a job and I find that it’s not like that. In addition to looking at your highest academic qualification , HR (human resources) also looks at your first academic qualification . I didn’t understand it at first. The first time I went for an interview, the HR (human resources) asked me , “Student, what is your first academic qualification?” I said, “Sunshine Baby Kindergarten” and I was promoted after the interview. That’s the feeling. And I think in this era , all young people are being compared and classified , right? Movies are not classified, but cattle and horses are classified into P5 (job level) and P6 (job level) P7 (job level) Inferior horses, middle horses, and middle horses. Every horse still thinks it is a thousand-mile horse and wants to wait for a Bole . After waiting for a long time, Tian Ji finally comes. Tian Ji does not train you, but just spurs you on . You ask Tian Ji every day if he wants to work overtime tonight. Tian Ji says , “Yes , yes. ” Right? I, the horse, can only write a resignation letter on the spot. The resignation letter has only six big words: ” Boss, your horse is gone.” I am really angry . To be honest , the postgraduate degree I took is actually not bad. I was admitted to the philosophy department of Sun Yat-sen University. You will not have this reaction when you hear about Guangcai. People are like this. And when I mentioned the philosophy department of Sun Yat-sen University, friends who are familiar with the program should think of another friend , Yu Xiangyu. He was also a very good friend of mine . I did talk shows with him in Guangzhou for four years, and then he went to After the show in 2016, I kept sending him WeChat messages. I asked him, ” Brother, when will you come back to Guangzhou to get together ? ” He always told me that he couldn’t go back because of something. Later, I realized that some things really can’t be undone. You know , after the show, my offline performances became very awkward because there were always audience members posting those kind of derogatory repo (feedback). The one comment that impressed me the most was this: He said that they were both graduate students in the philosophy department of CUHK, but the depth of Ji Chi’s jokes was obviously not as good as that of undergraduates. Yu Xiangyu, it seems that the first degree is really important. I said, “No matter what you want to do, my heart will also ache, okay?” I understood a truth, that derogatory comments have always existed , no matter what era it is, I thought to myself Even if we go back to the Tang Dynasty , there will still be people leaving comments under Du Fu’s poems. They are both Tang poets. It is obvious that Du Fu’s depth cannot compare with Li Bai . How can Du Fu reply to Du Fu? He can only reply below: Real Du, Fake Du. And have you ever imagined our Du Fu? How our Du Fu feels? How aggrieved our Du Fu is, like a dog licker. What do we write every day? Li Bai remembers Li Bai and chants his thoughts on spring. Li Bai , you turn around and see Li Bai writing in “Presented to Wang Lun”. Really, I moved from Guangzhou to you. I shoveled your cat litter for you. How come Fu Hang has become your best friend? The water of Taohuatan is three thousand feet high , but it is not as high as passion. I give you love. Many friends see this and ask me if my defense is broken. Is it true that I am broken ? We are building a house Real estate knows best how to break the defense. It’s all a mess. How can it not be broken? The thatched cottage was broken by the autumn wind. Okay , really, I wrote this paragraph and I came to the show. I didn’t do anything else. I just wanted my brothers to reply to WeChat often to see me. I miss you very much on WeChat. My major has been ruined. I don’t want my friendship to be ruined too. I want to protect my rights. In my eyes, friendship is friendship first and academic qualifications second. This is my “Talk Show and His Friends” 2. At the same time, I also hope that there will be less sectarianism in this world. Don’t divide it into first, second, and third. There is nothing in the first place , where can dust be caused? Let’s talk about this today. Thank you, thank you . It’s too difficult to talk behind them. Hurry up and count down the last voting time . Let’s applaud again for the chicken wings. Thank you, thank you friends Thank you Ji Chi for the first performance on this show . The purpose of telling this joke is to find his buddy to find someone. It ‘s mainly a joke. No , because I think this is a topic that I really want to talk about . It’s about some prejudices and some friendships . Before you say it, you will send a WeChat message to tell him that you are on this show, and then you may say it. He replied, “No need, right?” No, he also replied with four words. I was also very moved. He replied with four words, ” Good luck in the competition !” He didn’t reply with three words , “Who are you? ” He’s awesome . Let’s give applause to Ji Chi again. Ji Chi will take a break. Wang Ying, who is going to have a 1V1 PK with Ji Chi, is a contestant who uses a very calm performance to present very uncalm content. Applause, welcome Wang Ying. Hello everyone, my name is Wang Ying. I want to share with you about my illness. I got breast cancer two years ago . It was the breast cancer track for me, but I have been cured. Don’t be too nervous. At first, I hesitated whether to talk about this topic. I thought, if I want to talk about this, how can I tell whether the audience votes for me because it’s funny or because of sympathy? Then I thought again, I want the sympathy votes. How did I find out that I had this disease? My nephew was running around at home and bumped into my chest. My chest hurt all the time. Later I went to the hospital for a check-up and was diagnosed with breast cancer. To be honest, I was a little angry, so I asked the doctor, “Is it because that little bastard hit me ? I have to blame something, I can’t blame myself.” The doctor said, “No , it’s because he hit you that you were able to discover the disease so early. You are the luckiest among all the people here, do you know that? ” I said, “Aren’t you the luckiest person here ?” I accept it now . The reason I got sick was not because of my nephew. The main reason I got sick was because of staying up late and eating takeout. My mom said to scare you. After I got sick, a question has been bothering me. Why was it me ? Why me (Why me) I later thought of something. When I just graduated from college, I was very rebellious and shaved my head. People always asked me why I shaved my head. I was annoyed by it , so I told them that it was because I had cancer and was undergoing chemotherapy. I was shocked when I thought of this. I thought, God, would you think I was making a wish? After I was hospitalized, the doctor told me that the surgical plan was to have a complete mastectomy, that is, to remove one breast completely. This news was quite shocking. I cried when I heard it because I knew that I would lose not only a breast but also the right to choose a spouse for the next 50 years. I cried and looked at my boyfriend. I think at that moment we should have had the same thought, it was over . This time it would be difficult to change. I didn’t say that there was one less girl. I can’t find a boyfriend if I don’t have breasts . I know some girls are very good and attractive. Don’t say that you can find a boyfriend even if you have one more breast. I just said that it is really difficult for me to find a boyfriend. Later, my boyfriend told me that he didn’t mind my illness and would not break up with me because of the illness. He is really a good person. But I have heard a saying that there are no born good people , only civilized people who are restrained. So I want to tell everyone that he doesn’t mind, and everyone can restrain him to be a civilized person. My boyfriend is a good person, but he is very talkative. Before he got sick, we just discussed the episode of “Friends” about the sensitive points on the girl’s body. After deciding to remove all of them, he said, wouldn’t this mean that I would lose a sensitive point? I said that although I lost a sensitive point , I gained another sensitive point. Pay attention to what you say to me. The doctor said I could have reconstruction and a prosthesis put in, but it would be very painful and the recovery period would be long. I was afraid of the pain so I refused. The doctor kept persuading me to think about it carefully. You are still young. Do you want to consider your boyfriend’s opinion ? What if he wants to have a prosthesis? I said if he wants to, let him have it. He can have two. I can understand the doctor’s concerns. Many people feel that a person is incomplete after losing a breast. I have a friend who even came to comfort me and said, “Don’t feel incomplete. ” Amazon female warriors will directly cut off their right breasts to make it easier to shoot arrows . Their complete form is without a right breast. I said, but I cut off the left side. In their place, my left side is incomplete and the right side is redundant. The night before the operation, I It was quite stressful. The four patients in our ward couldn’t sleep. Their family members , our dearest people in the world , were snoring. I couldn’t sleep, so I looked around and found that only my mother was awake. I was very touched at the time, and felt that my mother loved me the most, so I said, “Mom, you can’t sleep either.” My mother asked, “How can you sleep with such loud snoring?” Before the operation , they pushed me to the corridor of the operating room. I was the only one lying there in the long corridor. It was easy for me to have random thoughts. My mind was full of thoughts about what to do if the operation failed ? What if it can’t be cured? Is it possible that it was a misdiagnosis ? How much money can I get for a misdiagnosis ? These were all my thoughts. Later, in order to ease my fear, I wanted to sing, but because I was too scared, my voice was shaking. I lay there and sang “Two Tigers, Two Tigers Run Fast.” The more I sang, the more uncomfortable I felt. One of them has no eyes and one has no ears , but they are two tigers with 8 breasts. The operation was quite successful. After the operation, I chatted with other patients in the hospital and heard some strange suggestions. One patient said that we ‘d better not eat seafood because seafood is not conducive to wound recovery. Another patient said that we should not eat sweets because cancer cells like sugar. Another patient said that it’s not right. The doctor didn’t tell me that I could eat whatever I wanted. I am still undergoing endocrine treatment. Endocrine treatment is menopausal injections and medication. Menopausal injections are to stop me from having menstruation, so I am 30 years old this year and I am in menopause. Menopause at this age is a bit embarrassing because I have the bad temper of menopause , but I don’t have the family status of menopause. I often want to scold my boyfriend for no reason, but then I think that I have no gratitude for raising him. I still have 3 years left in my endocrine treatment. Now I will I felt hot flashes , tired and uncomfortable. I felt particularly uncomfortable thinking that I would have menopause again in more than 20 years . My friend comforted me and said that fate is fair. Although it closes a door for you , it opens a window for you. Although your breast becomes one , menopause becomes two. Many people will change after suffering from such a serious illness and become more open-minded and less concerned about other people’s opinions. I have not changed like this because I didn’t care before. I feel that my weird behavior for so many years has finally got an answer. It turns out that I have been living like a cancer patient. Now someone asked me why I didn’t find a proper job. I said, because I have cancer. Why do you speak so harshly? Because I have cancer. Why did you get cancer? Because I like to ask others why . No, there is one benefit of not having cancer. I used to speak like this, and they thought I was crazy. Now he They think I’m just sick. Before the operation, I didn’t wear a bra for several years. There were always men on the street who stared at my breasts. I hated it. Now I still don’t wear a bra. You can see that it’s still quite obvious that one side is bulging and the other side is empty. Because I want to give those wretched men a little confusion. That’s all I have to say . Thank you everyone . Wang Ying’s countdown to the ticket lock channel. I have seen that video clip of Wang Ying before and I liked it very much at that time. And today’s performance is actually better than when I saw your offline performance. It’s more effortless and smooth. Although it is a sad thing , it made us laugh without any psychological burden. This is caused by the excellence of the work and the performance skills. So I admire and thank Wang Ying very much . She performed this piece on the stage very freely. Sometimes, no matter how good the content is, if there is no free expression , it may put some pressure on the audience . That’s great. Wang Ying’s performance today was really great. Because when many people face things that will definitely make them very scared , a performance like Wang Ying’s can really bring comfort and peace to their hearts . And there was a kind of feeling, especially when she said something just now, I was about to cry. She said that she had been living like a cancer patient. I felt that after so many years of weird behavior, I finally got an answer. It turns out that I have been living like a cancer patient. The point was that it really touched me. I think that many times, whether you are sick or not, you have to find a path that you really should take when you live in this world. That’s great . As a female audience, she faced her own body directly. There were some expressions that I personally liked very much, and it brought me a lot of strength. Thank you. Let’s give Wang Ying a round of applause again. Here , let’s take a look at the votes for Ji Chi and Wang Ying. Wang Ying successfully entered the promotion zone with 242 votes, and Ji Chi received 202 votes and will continue to wait in the waiting zone. Ji Chi is great. I mainly want to tell the audience who also suffers from breast cancer or other people in trouble not to care too much about other people’s opinions. It doesn’t matter. Because when I was in the hospital, I saw other patients and I felt that a large part of their pressure came from how the outside world would view her disease. I don’t care much about this myself , so I want to pass this idea on to them. The two who are about to meet you in the 1V1PK, I am smarter than him and you are smarter than him, let’s see who is smarter. You are confused and you didn’t tell others in advance. These three are not smart. We are the safe exit and we also come from comedy. Listen to what teacher Li Mengjie says . Let’s terminate the contract. I really don’t know who is smarter. Before the game, we chatted by ourselves and joked that we would have a civil war so that at least one of us could be saved. Then we didn’t expect that there would be a civil war. The two of us and Wu Ding We play more. First, Wu Ding and I live very close to each other. Second, we all share a common hobby , which is playing board games. We basically have dinner together every one or two weeks . The captain’s cat also often comes to our house to play. However, our cat and their cat don’t have a good relationship. It feels like fate. Everyone should have an impression of Wu Ding because this friend came last season. He was not satisfied with his performance. He devoted himself to practice and started again. Applause, welcome Wu Ding. Hello, everyone. I am Wu Ding. Hello , thank you . Then my name is Wu Ding. This is my second time on the show. Last year, the elimination was too fast. I came here from Hangzhou to record. The elimination was in the early morning and I was at home at noon. The high-speed rail is really convenient. I thought I was dreaming again . Maybe I didn’t get selected. This time I feel very uncomfortable. I also want to advance. I also want to write golden sentences. I will go back and concentrate on practice. I will study. I will read books and classics. “The Brothers Karamazov” is a very good book. I ca n’t get into good books. All of them are like this. I read it a year ago and read the three chapters three times. I was stuck in “The Karamazov”. I thought, “No, let’s just read the golden sentences.” I went online to look up its golden sentences. When I checked, I found that this book is a bit outdated, and its golden sentences are not popular at all. Things like “God fights the devil, and the battlefield is in the human heart ” are too obscure . The golden sentences I want are those that are simple, easy to understand and popular. ” The stars will not disappoint those who are on the road, and time will not disappoint those who are determined. ” How advanced! I looked it up and found that this sentence came from “I Don’t” by Da Bing. I found the wrong classic, and it’s really hard to concentrate when reading now. You read two pages of the book and then go to watch short videos. Read two pages of the book and then go to watch short videos. Since I started reading, I watch two more hours of Douyin videos every day. I am now addicted to those vertical screen short dramas , the kind that are very rustic, such as “The Three-Year Period Has Arrived” and ” Welcome the Dragon King Back to the Palace” . When I saw it for the first time, I sneered and said, “How can such nutritious garbage be addictive?” I watched it until the middle of the night and I was anxious. I asked, “Why is there a charge for the next episode?” Is the Dragon King dead? I now find that people like me just love to eat garbage. What’s on the Internet? Creator Consumer I am a decomposer. I look for garbage to eat everywhere on the Internet. I am a cyber fly on the Internet. Where there is garbage, there is me. I am very happy every night. I found another short play. I am a little obsessed with watching short plays now. I have started to write those cool talk shows. Let me show you one I wrote recently. Pay attention. When I woke up from a car accident, I actually went back to the moment before I was eliminated from a variety show. The level of talk shows around the world has dropped 100 times. Only I was reborn with my memories. This time I want to change everything. As soon as I opened my eyes, Zhang Shaogang pointed at me and said, “Wu Ding was eliminated. ” I said, “You will regret it.” Zhang Shaogang was furious and said, ” You are a waste. How dare you talk back? Beat me up. ” More than 50 security guards rushed up and were about to beat me up when suddenly a figure fell from the sky. They stopped and looked closely. It turned out to be Li Dan. All the audience were shocked. What? Even Dan has come out ? Who is this kid? Li Dan ignored the others and came straight to me to meet the God. The audience was shocked. What ? Is he the legendary God of Humor and Hilariousness? What did I say about Helicobacter pylori? All the audience went completely crazy and said this was too funny. This kind of God The skill has been lost for a hundred years. I stood on the stage with a devilish smile. The talk show should change. This is the joke I am writing now. I have been at home for a year and I haven’t written any golden sentences. I have written a short play. I said, isn’t this useless? I said I have to find a way. Finally, I thought of a self-help plan for myself. Let’s not watch anything else. Self- discipline isolates all sources of temptation . Make a self-discipline plan to go to bed early and get up early to create for 6 hours every day. I failed on the first day. I lay in bed at 10 o’clock on the first day . I started my plan for the second day. Get up at 8 o’clock in the morning and do aerobics on an empty stomach to create for 6 hours and write 200 hot jokes. Thinking about it, people start to fantasize again. I said this is too self-disciplined. With such self-discipline, I will definitely be famous next year. By then, I will earn 10 million . How do you say I will spend it? Then I started to plan this non-existent money. My first thought was to deposit it in the bank to earn interest. 10 million is a fixed deposit. This conservative way of financial management sounds like an old poor person. You can’t do anything about it. People’s imagination is constrained by material conditions. Have you seen poor people write cool articles? On the 80th birthday of Mrs. Hu , luxury cars gathered in front of her house. Some Peng, some Lai, and some Di. I fantasize about buying a villa At that time, I thought I had to buy a house near the subway for convenient commuting. I had no choice but to check which bank had the highest interest rate. The rural credit cooperative had the highest interest rate of 2.15% for more than three years. That was my 10 million yuan thrown in. I did nothing every year and got 215,000 yuan. With my consumption level, I am financially free. I can save more than 100,000 yuan every year . I will add more to my holdings in the rural credit cooperative (genius). Money makes money. The more I thought about it, the more excited I became. I had already figured out how to save money. I wore tattered clothes and put my cash in a woven bag. I went to the rural credit cooperative. The bank manager would definitely look down on me and slap me in the face as soon as I entered the door. How could a beggar dare to enter our bank? I calmly opened the woven bag and opened your dog eyes to see the cash. The light went straight into the sky. The manager said something, and the president was also startled and jumped down from the third floor and slapped the manager in the face . Bastard , do you know that the entire city of A can’t come up with 10 million yuan? You are fired, sir . I’m sorry for not recognizing a great man . This is our Rural Credit Cooperative Global VIP (membership) black card Then I will personally give you a book full of golden sentences, “Be good, pat on the head”. The more I think about it, the more excited I get, the more immersed I get. I had already forgotten that I didn’t have the 10 million. What I was playing with was virtual currency. I’m really a person who loves to fantasize. I wanted to go to bed early and do financial management in the void until two o’clock. My success does not depend on hard work, but purely on fantasy. Pure fantasy version of success. I love to fantasize too much . After I fantasize too much, I even have a new idea now. I think fantasy is more cost-effective than hard work . I have thought about it carefully, friends. Your hard work may not lead to success, but it will definitely be tiring. My fantasy may not come true, but it will definitely be cool. You work hard to succeed, have fame and fortune , enjoy life, and finally get happiness. I fantasize to be happy directly without having to work hard. Brother, the shortcut to pure happiness in life is to live in fantasy. The biggest advantage of fantasy is that fantasy will never go wrong, but the reality is not like this. The happiest time for your trip is before you set off. You imagine how unique the destination is, but when you get there, you find that they are all the same. Potato tarts, grilled sausages, big squids, I miss you very much in Shanghai. The happiest time for online shopping is waiting for the express delivery. You imagine how good-looking the clothes are when you wear them, but when the clothes arrive, you find that they are models. Good-looking and talkative Being in love is also the happiest thing for you. It’s when you just meet each other that you imagine how good the other person is. You think you’ve found a prince. When the mask is torn off, it’s Yang Zi. This is real life. The shortcut to life is to live in fantasy. I’ve endured for a year and I’ve realized it. Today I’m sharing it with you for free. The main purpose of my appearance on the show this time is to enlighten the people. I didn’t have time . I didn’t even write the script. I originally said one sentence when I came up: 99% of the Chinese people are living wrong. Now dream with me. When the show is broadcast, the audience across the country will surely suddenly realize it. You’re right. Thank you, His Holiness, for enlightening us. We will always follow the God. Thank you, everyone . I’m Wu Ding. Thank you , the Hilarious God. Everyone , hurry up and vote for the God. Come to Wu Ding to lock in the votes. Countdown. Thank you , thank you, everyone. I’m sorry, Mr. Wu Ding. We just need a villain and then we just happened to run into you. You need a villain. There are so many villains in the world. What I want to say is that I don’t care at all who will compete with the God. Look at this mentality. It’s so good. This year is really a short drama that has sublimated you. You’ve changed into a different person . This is the real me. Last season, I was a fake. The Prodigy was scalded to death because last season I thought that I might write something that I thought was better for my first time . I compared it to something online and found that the effect was not very good. I said, then just be yourself. Will you look at yourself when you pass by a mirror ? I saw that the God had eyes but did not recognize Mount Tai , and it turned out to be a mirror . I like it so much . I think the golden sentence you mentioned is already golden, already too golden, too golden. The shortcut to life is fantasy , right? I think I have been enlightened by this sentence. It’s about time. The great teacher really is. I think no matter how much we have, it is ultimately for the sake of happiness, right? You have already lived in that happiness in advance . That is called pre-made happiness . I filmed it, but I hesitated for a long time. Why is there this
? Because although everyone laughed happily throughout the whole process , his vulgar jokes made people feel strongly ashamed. Just like many people around us watch skits, although they watch them secretly and pay for them secretly , they pretend not to watch them when they get to the company and say that they don’t watch those things. Your company is right. Think back to the early years of Mr. Stephen Chow , who also took those vulgar things and deconstructed them . But halfway through, his ideological realm and profound connotation became higher, although it was still nonsensical. Funny and deconstruction. I really hope to see you on this track. Don’t just stay at the present. It’s so simple and fun . Thank you, Mr. Luo. This is the first time someone has said this about micro-short dramas on the talk show stage. And they turned micro-short dramas into their own talk show expressions so smoothly . It ‘s amazing. Thank you everyone. Let’s take a break. The one who will compete with Wu Ding is a group of manzai actors. They are also from the comedy comics. Generally, one of them is pretending to be stupid and the other is complaining . But the characteristic of these two people is that they both think they are smarter than the other. Applause. Welcome to the emergency exit. Hello everyone. There are also people above. Hello everyone . I am B. I am the captain. We are the emergency exit. Thank you everyone. I have watched a lot of this short video recently. I have also watched a lot of short dramas. I have watched a lot of high-end restaurant exploration videos. I like to watch this, right? I have never been there. I ask you , if you are given an opportunity, give me an opportunity. What opportunity would you choose to go to that kind of high-end place to eat? What is it? Slow down. What is it? Your partner suddenly died. Your partner suddenly died. We went to the banquet. Although I have never been there , I think that kind of place They must pay great attention to service. I think so. Let’s do this. Can you serve me? Hello , sir. Hello . We’ve been waiting for you for a long time. Thank you. If you are alone, please take a seat. This is our menu. Please take a look at it, sir. Don’t fold our iPad. This is an iPad. Sorry , I have a strong hand. How about this seafood set meal ? Seafood set meal? The seafood set meal is a little more complicated. There is a step of selecting ingredients. Select the ingredients now. Our ingredients today include king crab, tuna, corpse fish , grouper , corpse fish, it sounds like it has been dead for a year. This fish , grouper, you chose grouper, yes , that grouper, your choice is my choice. Why does Na Ying’s team have a reverse selection step? The mentor selection is here. Then I choose king crab, king crab , yes, king crab . Sorry, sir, there is no king crab. Just now, the king crab was overthrown by the worker crab. I heard from your accent that you are from Northeast China. You are from Northeast China. Please allow me to make you a chicken and mushroom dish . Chicken stewed with mushrooms. Chicken mixed with mushrooms. Can chicken mixed with mushrooms be eaten? Hey , don’t underestimate our chicken. Who has a bond with you ? What are you burning about? You , we don’t use ordinary ones here. The chicks are not ordinary chicks. The ones we use are the flat-billed chicks that we have carefully bred ourselves. Flat-billed chicks, right ? Isn’t that a duckling ? Isn’t that the quacking duckling? Isn’t that the duckling called duckling ? Don’t make beef when making beef. Don’t let the duckling make beef . Just let the duckling be itself, okay? So excited. Thank you, everyone. We are the safe exit. Thank you. I feel that manzai itself is a very difficult art form to operate. It is because they have to act crazy and stupid like a mental patient. There seems to be a little bit of intelligence left in their performance . The word ” remain” is completely stupid , completely like a mental patient, just a little bit away from that. It feels that if they are a little more mentally ill or a little more stupid, they will reach that state of perfection. Now they are still a little smart, right? After all, this is the first appearance on this stage and there has been a very good performance. We invited Wu Ding back to the stage again. Let’s take a look at the votes of the two groups of outstanding actors. Wu Ding got 240 votes. Congratulations to Wu Ding for entering the promotion zone. The safe exit, come on, you have to be in the pending zone . Humor God , what kind of short play is this today? Humor God, this thing is the real Wu Ding . See you, God, you are quite stupid But it ‘s also the kind of state where the imagination is open. I like it very much. I think the true knowledge of mankind has been found by him . Wu Ding, I worship him now. He is the king of golden sentences. I think he is the living Nietzsche. I think he has found the true knowledge of mankind. I like him so much. The group that is about to compete is Zhou Xinyu and Li Wen. The first one to perform is relaxed and happy. Applause, welcome Zhou Xinyu. Hello, everyone. My name is Zhou Xinyu. Thank you. I had a relationship last year and had a younger brother. There is a 12-year age difference between us. Every time I perform here, all the female audience’s reactions are, “I want to be like this too.” Male audiences will only say, ” The beast is very happy. ” He was born in 2002 and I was born in 2014. I mentioned the age mainly to reassure everyone that he is an adult. We met at a dinner party. He is really handsome. To what extent? As soon as I added WeChat , I sent his photo to all my sisters. My sister sent it to her sister. Sisters are endless. Maybe some boys will worry that their relationship will be sent out after hearing this . No , then as we chatted, I found out that he had just graduated from college. I was shocked at the time . He was going to start eating young grass so soon. Too It’s strange. When I saw this sentence before , I would put myself in the shoes of the grass. I do n’t know when I started to put myself in the shoes of the old cow. Maybe it was when I had the financial means. I really think it’s great to be an old cow. Only when you become an old cow can you discover the tender grass that grows up in batches every spring. Two years ago, I had some fantasies about how a man should be both internal and external. Two years ago, I had dinner with a boy born in 2000. I thought it was not okay and stupid at the time . Now, two years later, I started to have dinner with the boy born in 2002. Now I think I was really stupid before because I found that men don’t necessarily become more mature as they get older , but they will definitely become older. So now I have decided to like 22-year-olds. 22 years old is great. 22 is the best age for a man. Think about it. He has just graduated from college and is still fresh. He has the ability to enter the society and doesn’t have much money. He is the age that needs help. So I plan to help 22 (years old) this year, 22 (years old) next year, and 22 (years old) the year after. Of course, if he is particularly outstanding, we can also make an exception and consider accepting his aging , right? Gentle and considerate I can accept him as 23 (years old). I can accept him as 24 (years old) if he is emotionally stable. So from now on, everyone can get his comprehensive score directly from my boyfriend’s age. I not only want to objectify handsome men, but also quantify handsome men. But after getting along with this brother for two months , I found that this brother is not simple. He began to lack money. He didn’t lack a lot of money. He didn’t lack the kind of three or five hundred thousand. He just lacked thirty or fifty yuan , which is difficult for you to afford, right? If I don’t give him this little money, he won’t live past 24 (years old). He is still quite simple. He is the kind of person who goes crazy every Thursday . You even think he is a little cute. Weekly v (post) He spends 50 yuan a month and spends 200 yuan of my money crazily. 200 yuan a month sounds very similar to me. I have a card with him. What do you think other people’s love is? It’s a good or bad fate. I’m just a distinguished member. Sometimes the 50 yuan on the table is gone. I forgot to turn off the automatic renewal. In the stereotype, don’t sisters spend a lot of money on their brothers, right? I don’t want to eliminate this misunderstanding now. I usually say to others that it ‘s just like you imagined. Just give him whatever he wants. You can’t let the child starve to death, right? So you can hear it, right? If you are in a relationship with me, you will get food, but it will be a bit difficult to provide accommodation. I am still traditional, I think Men should still be raised in poverty . It’s not that he can find me. He is not even a materialistic boy. He is just a boy who lacks material things. But I still don’t like to mix money into relationships. So sometimes I would ask a sister of mine. She is the kind of person who doesn’t trust men at all. She always tells me that women should not spend money on men. Spending money on men will bring bad luck for the rest of their lives. Then she sent his photo to her. She said, “Just spend a little. 200 a month is not a lot. There are only a few people in their dormitory. But I should say that I will spend 200 on him at most. No more. It’s not that I don’t have money. It’s that I have a sense of responsibility . I can’t drive up prices. Driving up prices will lead to inflation.” The young grass is spoiled by inflation. She dares to order large portions of fries. We broke up soon because as my brother got older, his appetite also grew bigger and bigger. He wanted to eat, wear and play every day. The reason for our breakup was that my backward productivity could not keep up with my brother’s growing material needs. I was going to finish this script, but a male actor told me that there was something wrong with your script . You objectified people too much and used them as tools , which would backfire . I thought to myself, now you know how women feel. Sometimes I sigh and feel like there are no men in this society who are not materialistic. I don’t You know, so I’m on the show again. Every June is the season for college students to graduate. After all, flowers have a day to bloom again. There are only 6 teenagers in one dormitory. I decided not to call her Zhou Xinyu anymore. I will call her Zhaodi Lai Di Pan Di. Speaking of this, thank you. In fact, Xinyu’s last expression is the key to her article. You finally know how we feel, but she put it too last. So many people in the front may still have an unspeakable feeling of being offended. At first, they didn’t dare to laugh. Later, they felt that it might be too materialistic. In short, when such emotions last too long until you give the last key point, it is impossible to save the atmosphere of the whole scene. Yes , but such expression is too important, because only we can talk about this topic. Only then can we put some problems on this stage in a very formal, non-greasy and non-frivolous way. In fact, when there is a difference in age, the male must be older and the female must be younger. This is an inherent concept of ours. We have been disciplined like this. So I think her expression is very brave . So I feel that I must shoot this light. This is the meaning of this light that I wanted to express just now . Thank you, Teacher Lu Yu. First of all, I admire you very much Talking about this topic , more and more female talk show hosts are not afraid of offending others by talking about these things. I am actually very happy. So I think there is nothing wrong with your topic choice , but it is also a fact that this topic is more risky. Applause again to Xinyu. Thank you. The one who will compete with Xinyu is a newcomer who is on this stage for the first time. Applause, welcome Li Wen. Hi, I am Li Wen. I am a student. I am currently a graduate student in chemistry. I am already in my third year of graduate school. I have clearly felt that I am not a material for scientific research. My thesis is written like a joke. There is no argument, only funny points. I showed my thesis to my supervisor. Every time he read it for 3 seconds, he started to make facial expressions. Every time he saw my thesis, he asked me , “Where are you going to publish this article on QQ space? ” My supervisor is very good, a very kind old professor. The only problem is that he is a little old and has a habit of speaking. He is particularly accustomed to using interrogative sentences. As soon as he opens his mouth, he will ask himself a question and then answer it himself. He feels that it has nothing to do with you. He has meetings with us every week. The first thing they say at the meeting is, “Classmates, are you going to do this experiment ? If you do, is it just about doing experiments? No , you don’t know why he wants us to do it. No one cares about him at the scene . Apart from doing experiments What else to do? This is the question you have to think about. It will always be like this. After a long time, you will be really confused . I really want to know if he talks like this to the people around him in his daily life , especially my master’s wife. For example, when the two of them were in love, the mentor walked up to the master’s wife and said, “Hey , let me tell you something. When I first saw you, I thought you were beautiful . I have been very attracted to you during this period of time. So do I like you?” This is a bit vulgar, but it is not ironic. My mentor is because we have a very good relationship and are very familiar with each other. We have known each other for three years. There were times when we were not familiar with each other. When we first came, we didn’t have many opportunities to see each other all day long. I especially wanted to show myself in front of him and wanted to lick him. He just gave me a chance. He wanted to drive his car to take me from Shanghai to Huzhou, Zhejiang on a business trip. It took two and a half hours. Friends, my mentor and I are both the kind of people who are not good at talking or chatting, so you can imagine that if two of you like this sit in that car for more than two hours , it must be very awkward. But I didn’t expect that we were so awkward that we couldn’t find the second sentence after saying the first sentence in the car . After getting in the car, he asked me , “Li Wen, are you seated?” I said, “I am seated.” He didn’t drive either, and we were just in a stalemate for more than ten or twenty seconds. I asked him what he meant, that I didn’t sit properly, but he was just a little slow , which made the situation very awkward . But luckily, because I had thought clearly about how I wanted to lick him, I prepared three topics the night before. We’ll talk about our hometowns , our ages , and our families when we get in the car tomorrow . Two and a half hours passed quickly. After getting in the car, I started to prepare to speak. My mentor’s surname is Zhu, so I called him Teacher Zhu. I asked him, “Teacher Zhu , where are you from? ” Teacher Zhu was very nice, and he said, “I’m from Hangzhou. ” I said, “I ‘m not prepared for Hangzhou , but I still told him.” I said there is the West Lake in Hangzhou, and he said to me, “I’ve been to Lingyin Temple, and it’s quite spiritual.” He said, ” Yes.” It’s obvious that Teacher Zhu doesn’t like to talk either, but he is also very emotionally intelligent. He could tell that I couldn’t continue speaking, so he took over the conversation and asked me, “Xiao Li, where are you from? ” He asked me a little nervous because I only prepared questions, and I didn’t expect he would ask me more questions. But luckily, his questions were simple, so I just answered them well . I said I was from Chengdu, and he said, ” It’s obvious that he wasn’t prepared either. ” I knew that the conversation couldn’t continue, so I had to move on to the next topic. The next topic I prepared was to ask him his age, and so I asked him , “Teacher Zhu, how old are you now ?” I felt a little ambiguous after asking him. As soon as we got in the car, he asked about my hometown and then asked about my age . I felt like I was pursuing him . But Teacher Zhu is a very nice person . He told me that I was born in 1963. I said, “1963 is good. 1963 is the Year of the Rabbit. ” I was born in 1999, and I am also a Rabbit. Teacher Zhu, we are so predestined. You are 36 years older than me , so you are 71 (years old) this year. Teacher Zhu was driving and he said to me, “Xiao Li is 61 (years old) . I was there for a long time before I reacted. I said, “61 (years old). It’s true. That’s a long life.” After I said these three He ignored me after hearing the word. My friends could clearly feel that they had said something wrong. It was obvious , but you know, I was already very nervous just sitting in that seat. I was even more nervous when I said that to the wrong person. After I was too nervous, my mind started to completely race. Originally, the next topic was to talk about family. I wanted to ask about his wife. After my mind started to race, I suddenly had an idea. I said, if I ask his wife , what if his wife is already dead? Wouldn’t that be too rude of me? Wouldn’t that be very offensive? This idea flashed through my mind in a flash and I said I asked Teacher Zhu, “Are you single now? ” and Teacher Zhu fainted. Teacher Zhu was still driving. He turned around and said, “It’s so awkward. The story actually ends here.” Some time ago, I asked Teacher Zhu , “Teacher Zhu, I’m going to tell this story on the show. Do you still remember this incident? In the past three years, every time I talked about this incident, I was so embarrassed that I dug my toes into the ground. I think my performance at that time was really bad and left a very bad impression on you.” He said, “I have forgotten this incident and it has passed. Things in the past should be treated like this. Forget it. Thank you everyone. That’s it.
I’m Li Wen . Bye, Li Wen, countdown to locking tickets. Have you told this story to Teacher Zhu? I haven’t told this story to Teacher Zhu because I know this story. Actually, it only lasts six or seven minutes on stage , but actually offline, this story lasts more than 20 minutes in total . I’ve been talking all the time because the ride will be very long , right? Yes, the ride will be very long, and there are other things on the car. It’s so unlucky to be your teacher. I kept looking at Teacher Zhu through the window. Teacher Zhu said, “How is it? This child hasn’t left yet and has been remembering it. ” So what do you think of Li Wen’s performance ? It’s very cute , very good. At that time, I thought Should we shoot this light? We have to shoot. Many teachers have this habit. Do you have this habit? I won’t . I won’t because I will alert myself. Let me give you an example. I used to do a legal program, and then I was a guest. He liked to use idioms when he spoke, but he kept the last word for the chain so that you didn’t listen to me. So Shaogang ‘s case was shocking. What’s the matter? You can’t answer “Wen” . You can’t answer “Wen ” . This is his speaking habit . What’s the matter? The performance is not good either. How about this manzai? Thank you, all the great teachers. This is a manzai. Is it difficult for you to learn silence ? Yes , then let’s learn silence first . It’s okay. Let’s shoot from a distance. Come on, come on , I ‘ll do it. Let’s do it. What’s the matter? It’s totally unguessable. It ‘s shocking . Thank you, thank you , three-person manzai. Because I am a teacher , so Li Wen ‘s observation of teachers is very accurate and meticulous. There is not only one Teacher Zhu in this world, but everyone is Teacher Zhu. Sometimes I admire this kind of actor , but his case is actually a trivial matter , a trivial matter. Yes , you just talked about teacher-student relationship and so on. You are all chicken soup words. I have pulled it up and you just pulled it up. To me, it feels like a trivial matter, but it is captured very, very accurately and meticulously, and then it makes us recall our lives. In my life experience, someone has a weird habit of speaking. Although it may not be completely consistent with him , a similar person is very interesting , and it produces a very strong sense of pleasure and something very good. In fact, I want to talk about what you just said because I want to thank an actor in particular , who is also in our program . The actor is Li Mengjie. Because , as you just said , this is a very small thing. When I was writing this paragraph before, many people reminded me or questioned me . Do you want to continue writing about such a small thing ? What else is there to write about ? Then someone recommended to me a 30-minute paragraph about “1818 Golden Eye” posted by Li Mengjie on the Internet. It is also a small thing , but it is very interesting. It is very vivid and interesting. After reading it, I was very encouraged, and then I continued to do what you have done. Very good. Let us welcome Xinyu back to Taichung again . Let’s take a look at the votes Zhou Xinyu and Li Wen received respectively. Li Wen 254 votes entered the promotion zone. Xinyu needs to continue waiting in the waiting zone. That’s good . The two who are about to compete in PK are Xiaokuai and Xu Zhisheng.