父亲用儿子’擦边照’催相亲，我们可以不要彩礼 安能辨我是雌雄！丨《脱口秀和Ta的朋友们 第二季》 STAND-UP COMEDY2
Hello, friends on the first and second floors. I am Jia Hao. As you all know, competition is a very tense process. Some time ago, in order to relieve the tension, I went to Guangzhou with my good friend Liang Haiyuan to visit a good friend. When we checked into the hotel, the front desk guy was very enthusiastic and checked us in in Cantonese Mandarin. Who is Mr. Liang? His name is Liang Haiyuan. Mr. Liang smiled at me, and then he asked who is Mr. Jia. You can see that smile transfer from my face to Haiyuan’s face. At that moment, Haiyuan smiled. I was quick-witted. I was Mr. Wolf. I immediately took Mr. Wolf’s position. I am the big-butt king who is best at grabbing stools. At that time, I even thought that I should come and play with my dad. That would be too funny. Big Jia and Little Jia. Of course, my dad definitely has no time to do this recently. Let me tell you what my dad has been busy with recently. The focus of his daily life is to search my name on Weibo and control the comments on all the posts about me . But many of the posts about me don’t have any comments. Have you ever controlled the comments on the blank screen? There are many posts under which my dad is the only one who is wasting time. Brother, he is awesome . It’s not easy to get 3 comments on a post. If you click in and see, one is from my dad, one is from my mom, and one is a comment. Robert , my dad also sorted out my videos and posted them on his own account. There was an uncle who said My dad praised me for being a celebrity son and said that he didn’t even have a girlfriend. Then another uncle said that only an excellent father can raise an excellent son. My dad said, “I’m ashamed, I don’t even have a girlfriend.” My dad used “I don’t have a girlfriend yet” as a period and said, “No , I don’t have a girlfriend yet. ” He really worries that I’m not married now. When I went home for the New Year to have dinner, the people at the table urged me to have a glass of wine. I wanted to be a grandfather and scared me so much that I didn’t dare to say a word. I just pretended to be a grandson. The more I drank , the more unreliable I became. I said that you must buy a house in Shanghai and your family can support you because you must get married. I told my dad about the average house price in Shanghai and he said that you must get married. I even gave my dad some knowledge about the average bride price standards in Jiangsu, Zhejiang and Shanghai. My dad drank too much that day and was so crazy that he said we can do without a bride price. We can do without a bride price. How can we tell whether I am a man or a woman? Anyway, my dad is urging me online and offline now. Social media has become my only pure land. But a month ago, my dad invaded social media. How did I find out? Because his social media ID (user name) is his real name. My dad goes on social media with his real name. You see, your parents’ ID (user name) is nothing more than something like “clouds are light and wind is light, the sea is vast and the sky is vast. ” My dad’s ID (user name) is … I’m afraid you will go there later. Search for him. After all, there are not many people named Jia*cai. But in fact, you only need to write the two words Jia Hao in the repo (feedback). You don’t need to search for him. He will search for you. It’s like fishing. You throw in the two words Jia Hao . After a while, you will receive a message saying ” Hao Ge is awesome”. He also runs social media and posts various posts. Some time ago, on my mother’s birthday, he posted a social media post with the title “Happy 60th Birthday to my wife”. The cover photo is of me in a swimsuit. I swear I’m not bragging . The cover photo is of me in a swimsuit wakeboarding. Have you ever touched the homepage of your parents? You say he understands the Internet, right? He uses his real name to go online. You say he doesn’t understand, right? He knows What kind of photo has traffic? Happy 60th birthday to my wife. Why did you put my photo? Then someone said that Jia Hao was 60 (years old). Then someone said that the main point was that someone called him wife. Later, some people started to slander him. I felt something was wrong when I saw him putting on makeup. He is so good at writing. This is so cruel. I can understand that the audience is joking, but why are there still viewers saying that Brother Hao, you look so good in a swimsuit? I felt really ashamed after hearing this . I don’t even have a girlfriend. Some viewers even asked where I bought such a beautiful swimsuit. Is there any need to ask? I got the good stuff in 30 minutes on Meituan Flash Sale. Meituan Flash Sale is so fast. This swimsuit is so short. Have you seen “Fast and Furious”? Now the swimsuit post on social media has more than 500 comments. I took a look. There were comments praising my dad or uncle for being good at using the Internet. My dad replied, ” Excuse me, it ‘s just a simple operation.” I was so angry that I laughed after hearing that. “This is a simple operation. If you want to make it complicated, I have to blur the photo. Your life is peaceful and I am just skirting the edge. My dear Mr. Jia, my dad really does all kinds of tricks. He also taught me that if the fans are so good to you , you should invite the fans to your home for dinner when you have time. He really did it. When I went home for the New Year, I met a person who said he was my fan and invited him home directly. You see , my dad had private contact with fans and brought them home. If this matter is exposed, I hope that the parents’ behavior will not be escalated to the person. Of course, I know that this is all the love of the parents. Finally, I want to share with you a piece of news that happened a few days ago. My mother also joined the social media and asked me for some photos. I went to check her homepage. She hasn’t posted anything yet, but I know she is ready to go. She just created an account and she is still maintaining the account, but she didn’t use her own name. The account she created is still a fake account. Don’t search for her because my mother’s ID (user name) is Jia Hao’s mother. Thank you everyone, I am Jia Hao. Thank you for this 290 (votes), absolutely 290 (votes) This is too strong. Please, let him get more than 290 votes. Please, the ticket lock channel for Jia Hao is open. Let ‘s give applause to Jia Hao again. Teacher Zhang, I want to say one thing first . I asked my parents to change their names. You don’t have to search for them. Let them change their names. So, brother Hao, if they post some content on social media now , will you review their content? Definitely not. I even thought about asking my dad to use social media less , but then I felt that this was also his right. I don’t have any right to ask him not to use it. If I ask him not to use it, it would be a bit difficult. When I was a child, he asked me not to use it directly, but we may have to discuss a degree. I told my dad that if you praise me, it’s OK , but if someone scolds me in the future, they may scold you. My dad said, “I’ve seen everything. It’s just your hit show. Did your parents go to watch it as a group? There were 8 people in Chengdu, including my aunt, my third aunt, and my cousin . My husband , my father and my mother are holding a silk scarf together. I want to ask, when you encounter some of their behaviors, do you feel more loved, happier or more embarrassed? I think happiness accounts for about 70% and 30% is embarrassing. For example , when I saw the swimsuit photo for the first time, I thought to myself that I should delete it quickly. What should I do? But later my father told me that I would not adjust the homepage. He said, “Look, I accidentally provided you with a joke, but you don’t even thank me.” He is like this . I think my feelings are similar to yours because my parents, especially my mother , have done some things that I find incredible. But for example, one day when I came home, I found a roll-up banner of mine at home , which is a roll-up banner of the same height. Where did she take it back at home ? She felt that she could not leave it outside and she had to take it back. So when I went home, I saw my own roll-up banner at home I feel very weird inside . Where am I now? I am also at home now. Teacher Chunchun , I can relate to this. When we were in the finals last year, everyone who entered the finals had a big poster that seemed to be two meters high. After I sent that poster home, my mother nailed it to the headboard of their bed. When they woke up, they could see it and said that their son was with them. It was really scary, very scary. I have also encountered this. After I got home, I saw that fans gave me a big bath towel. My mother covered it with words “I love Da Zhangwei” on it. And when parents are together, they feel happy for you. Jia Hao has a magical power that he is always full of energy. When he comes up, he can instantly bring you into the atmosphere and infect you, so you are very happy throughout the whole process. But if you think completely calmly, it seems that compared with the previous show, this work is relatively mediocre, but he has the ability to make this a bit like Xu Haolun. They have the ability to infect the whole thing, so I still think it is very special. Well, actually, last time I finished watching a show , I thought about it and went backstage to see him just to let him tell me his father’s real ID (user name), and then I added him with a small account. So sometimes when I’m in a bad mood, I just fish there and I feel very happy when I interact with him. Brother Hao is awesome. His state will infect everyone. It’s really good. I think you are really very happy. Applause to Jia Hao . He is indeed a talk show actor who gets stronger and stronger. He has formed a set of powerful performance style and his ability to control the stage is getting better and better. So, can he enter the next round directly ? Please see. Today, I feel that I am very happy with my performance and the feedback from the audience is also very good. It is possible that he can enter directly. In terms of the effect, he can enter with more than 290 (votes). Jia Hao is awesome and he will advance directly. Applause to Jia Hao . The first talk show actor who will advance directly in the second round . Brother Hao is awesome , awesome, awesome. Brother Hao is awesome.